Adventures in Writing

Totally, Randomly Researching Dr. Seuss

2012-01-11T11:19:00.000-08:00

The man was fascinating. Creative, funny - I love his almost incoherent writing, with its' own language, and its' own rules of reality. Seuss & Dahl are definitely two of my favorite writers.

So in case you want to join me, or you're doing a school project, or whatever, here are some links & some fun:

*an interview with "Mrs. Seuss"

*article about Dr. Seuss' habits & method of production

*a lengthy biography about Seuss (Dr.)

*a 2003 documentary entitled "Dr. Seuss: Rhymes & Reasons"

*some Seussian quotes

*& his official site, Seussville

Procrastinating & Legitimate Excuses

2012-01-09T13:46:00.000-08:00

I don't know about everyone else, but between working, studying, watching episodes of Psych & becoming ill (I'm sick again, and am currently looking into the process of seceding from one's own body), I have not been doing a stellar job of honing my writing craft.

But I'm sick of making excuses! Surely my ever-widening ass (which I swear I can actually feel growing larger as I sit before the computer in the office where I work) can be kicked into gear! Or at least tricked.

A pretty awesome guy on Twitter, Berick Cook, has begun posting flash fiction. & it really made me think - flash fiction is hard, but I should be able to do that.

& so B. Cook has inspired me to start a challenge. Initiated as a self-challenge, anyone can feel free to join me. For the rest of January, I am going to aim to post 2 pieces of flash fiction each week on this blog. Inspiration can come from anywhere. Word length can be as short as possible. The only stipulation is that each story must have a beginning, middle & end.

If anyone would like to join me, on their own blog or in the comments of mine, feel free to drop a comment on this post & let me know! Others who stumble across this blog can be prepared to see my writing regretsy posts (which will never be as awesome as this).

Another Supernatural YA

2011-12-24T19:24:00.001-08:00

And not a particularly good one, is the novel Switched, by Amanda Hocking. It does have a pretty cover, though:

Read me - I'm like the poppy field from the Wizard of Oz
gone demented

The cover is arresting, and the story is an interesting one. The title of the novel refers to the fact that protagonist Wendy is a changeling, having been switched at birth with a human boy to become a parasite living off of a rich & wealthy human family. Aside from the fact that the novel deals with changelings, however, there is another interesting plot device: Wendy is a troll.

As far as supernatural beings go, trolls have not been done to the extreme in fiction - at least, not yet.

I also know hardly anything about troll lore, other than a few fairy tales, the most notable being The Three Billy Goats Gruff. So it's difficult for me to decipher how much of the mythology of this book has already existed and how much is due to the ingenuity of the author. Either way, the ideas espoused are fascinating.

The writing, on the other hand, is pretty horrific. This novel was previously a bestselling self-published e-book, and the author gets my kudos for successful marketing and sales, but not for craftsmanship. As I've previously stated, the ideas are terrific; the writing, however, is simply not good enough to make the ideas shine.

My verdict: pass on this novel, unless you are only interested in the plot of a novel.

(Switched is slated to be released in early January, 2012.)

On Naked People

2011-12-24T14:49:00.001-08:00

Not so recently, I finished reading Ellis Avery's forthcoming novel The Last Nude. The cover, not so surprisingly, has a nude on it:

I have no clothes on.
That's what a nude is.

The Last Nude tells the story of two women, the artist Tamara de Lampicka and her model and lover Rafaela Fano.

The majority of the novel is told from Rafaela's point of view during the period in which she met Tamara, modeled for her, and their relationship came to an abrupt halt. This portion of the novel is interesting, and really portrays a naive young woman growing up in an exotic, new place, and falling in love for the first time.

Some of the writing in this section was fabulous, most of it was merely okay, some of it was downright boring. Rafaela is in many ways naive, yet often the writer manages to make her seem stupid, and I don't necessarily think this is on purpose.

Overall, the story sort of has a detached feeling - or perhaps this is simply the impression I received as an uninvested reader, I'm not entirely sure. I did receive a favorable impression of the story, but as longtime readers are aware, I'm more of a character gal, personally, and so did not become invested in this novel in a manner that will lead me to rave about it.

The latter, far shorter portion of the novel deals with the fact that the area in which Rafaela was living was dangerous during the second World War. And Rafaela is a Jew. Many of the characters peopling this novel, in fact, are Jewish.

This latter portion is what makes me feel that Avery was trying to achieve a very personable novel, with characters that the reader will become emotionally invested in, and failed.

It's an okay read. As I mentioned earlier, this novel is not one that I will rave about. I feel more lukewarm towards it - which is, perhaps, more damning praise than any censure.

Recommended for beach reads or display books due to the interesting cover.

A Celebrated Birthday & a Contest in Her Honor

2011-12-18T07:45:00.001-08:00

Jane Austen, whom I think we all agree was an amazing woman, as well as an amazing writer, is currently the subject of a contest at AustenBlog.

Click on "currently" above to check out the contest yourself, and ponder how (or if) Austen has influenced your life.

Review: The Dressmaker

2011-12-17T07:44:00.000-08:00

Don't you love how clever and original my blog titles are? I spend so much time sitting at my desk, chin in hand, pondering ways to amuse my readers.
And today, dear readers, I am going to review Kate Walcott's The Dressmaker. The cover for this novel is eye-arresting, with a beautiful purple dress on the cover, worn by a faceless woman (intrigue! glamour!)...

The Dressmaker is an historical fiction, revolving around that famous boat ride on the Titanic. Protagonist Tess is a feisty lass who doesn't want to demean herself any longer in a position of servitude, and consequently voluntarily agrees to temporarily act as lady's maid to the famed dress designer Lucille Duff Gordon so that she can sail the Titanic to a new world, and a new life.
Now, I don't want to ruin the book for anyone, but I cannot discuss this book without some spoilers. So read on, AT YOUR PERIL.

The Titanic, while a beautiful, luxurious boat, has a tiny flaw - it can't hold its' own against a giant iceberg.

This big boat is not equipped to handle ice -
I bet those were some warm drinks...

Now, don't get me wrong. This book was not complete shit. Just the majority of it was shit. There was this weird love triangle between Tess, a sailor much in the same situation as she - poor, trying to make a life for himself in a new country, [insert cliche here], and an older, rich gentleman whom she was incredibly attracted to who treated her like an e

qual. She liked both of them, for different reasons, and always seemed to have green grass syndrome - she was always thinking of and pining for the other gentleman when she was with one of them. This I found very annoying, despite the fact that it's probably pretty accurate.
Then, this novel dealt with some unpleasant aspects of suffering a catastrophe. The fact is, not everyone is a hero. In fact, most people aren't heroes. And most people probably would not be heroes in a situation like the Titanic. Being on a boat that was thought unsinkable, but is, in fact, sinking, would be extremely frightening. Instinct tends towards self-preservation.

This novel made me think about the people who weren't heroes. The ordinary people, the ones who said: "I'm not against other people living, but I don't want to die." The ones who did not go out of their way to help save other people, the ones who did not selflessly go down with the ship, playing music, or patiently waiting in a tuxedo.

The ones more like me.

Of course, Tess was one of those annoying goody-two-shoes, who is like: "It is my personal responsibility to save every child on this ship -" Very valiant; not necessarily the most interesting of characteristics, however.

Heroes, after all, tend to be most interesting when they're rescuing you. Possibly tend only to be interesting when they're rescuing you, unless they are extremely well written.

I liked the way this novel broadened my thinking. I hated Tess, who frankly can't live up to the name usurped from a Thomas Hardy novel...

Well, except for this BBC miniseries adaptation, which manages to make Tess of the D'urbervilles seem like the most boring story ever...

Response: Regarding the Holidays

2011-12-07T05:24:00.000-08:00

So today, Shelf Awareness featured this quote in its' (week)daily newsletter:

"Technology is ruining the holidays. A download is a dud gift (dudload?). When you give a 'real world' book to someone you are saying, 'I am totally in love with this book and think you will be too,' or 'The sentiment in this book reminded me of you,' or 'Here, this is a journey you will never forget.' A book is a personal gift--something uniquely picked out, inscribed, and physically presented to another person. It has emotional and actual weight. I am not saying there are not other good gifts out there (a ukulele comes to mind), but with a book you don't have to: mortgage the home, guess bra size, learn to sing, or find out too late that they are allergic to nuts. That is why I think the book is the best gift you can give. It is economical, beautiful, hours of entertainment, thoughtful, and can last (both physically and in the mind) a lifetime."

--Steven Salardino, manager of Skylight Books, Los Angeles,
Calif.,from the bookstore's latest e-newsletter

& I must say, I do not necessarily agree with the thesis.

To begin with, a gift is a gift. I am one of those people who truly does believe it is the thought that counts. At the moment, I am exceedingly poor. My friends are very poor. For some people, the purchase of a book - hardcover or paperback - is simply more than they can afford. If someone gives me a card, I am grateful that they thought of me.

This is the issue with saying that a download or a gift card or anything else is not a "real" gift - it's ungrateful and it's pretentious.

Receiving anything - electronic, handwritten - is something of which a person should be appreciative. And while it can feel more meaningful to receive something that was hand picked by someone else who is thinking of you, it can feel exceedingly annoying to receive something that has been hand picked by someone else which you already own and/or which shows that person obviously knows nothing about you.

I once received a sweater 2 or 3 sizes too large with a ruffly neck. I was 20. & this was not a cute ruffle - it was too large, of knitted fabric, and the wrong color, to boot. I was glad to receive a gift, but mortified that the giver thought I was that much larger than I actually am, and at the realization that it was, in fact, possible for me to look like a grandmother at 20-years-old. All I had to do was wear that sweater. (I'm shuddering now just thinking about it.)

Receiving a gift is always nice - receiving a gift that has been "hand picked" by someone who did not take the time or make the effort to get to know you kind of defeats the purpose.

So if you're thinking of someone, but it's difficult to figure out the perfect gift for that person in between working 3 jobs, taking 12 credit hours, and raising a couple of kids, is it really so wrong to purchase something that gives the receiver some flexibility? (This is not me, by the way - only two jobs; not in school again yet; no kids... Just a random example.)

If you purchase a gift card, that means that the receiver can purchase whatever they want at the location for which you purchased that card. If you receive a download, that means that there are more options for where to obtain, read, etc. this gift - all you need is a computer. Maybe you can simply carry your gift around at all times, on a Smart Phone. (I can't - I always abuse my phones, and so don't bother to purchase a nice, expensive one - but maybe you can...)

I understand where this bookseller is coming from - he sells books, and he wants to make it sound appealing for other people to sell books, too. But I think it's ridiculous to claim that technology is ruining the holidays. The fact is, some e-books are nearly as expensive as the hard copies, and will not be purchased anyway. Yet there are some very great e-books out there which are less expensive, and therefore more fiscally feasible for some people to obtain.

A gift which results in more variety, as well as encourages literacy should not be looked down upon. Period.

The Fake Blog Post

2011-12-06T15:06:00.000-08:00

aka, a link to a review I did as a guest for AustenBlog.

The review was for a murder mystery that made numerous allusions to Persuasions entitled Murder Most Persuasive. If you haven't read it yet, you really should.

Turkey Day is Nearly Here!

2011-11-23T06:15:00.000-08:00

I'm finishing a book review to post soon, but with work and the massive amounts of turkey I plan to consume tomorrow, it is difficult to pin down exactly when that post will occur.

In the meantime, here's something we can all be thankful for: bad sex in literature.

Use the (expletive deleted) Correct Vocabulary. (expletive deleted)

2011-11-01T15:02:00.000-07:00

I was at Briarwood Mall the other day, and as I was leaving, I approached the bank of doors -

Door (n.)

a moveable, usually solid, barrier for opening and closing an entranceway, cupboard, cabinet, or the like, commonly turning on hinges or sliding in grooves
a doorway
the building, house, etc., to which a door belongs
any means of approach, admittance, or access
any gateway marking an entrance or exit from one place or state to another*

On these movable, solid barriers which are supposed to turn on hinges at a light touch and allow passage into the great outdoors** were 8" x 11" sheets of white paper on which were crudely handwritten: "Machine

Machine: (n.)

an apparatus consisting of interrelated parts with separate functions, used in the performance of some kind of work.
a mechanical apparatus or contrivance; mechanism.

Out of Order."

I blithely walked right to the door, my hand extended before me to swing the door open on the aforementioned hinges, and it stuck. A girl dressed entirely in black clothing walked by and said: "It's out of order."

And I, dear reader, was mad. I was angry. I was enraged. (Which is slightly ridiculous, but that's another story...)

When you see "machine out of order," you're generally expecting a credit card machine or an ATM or something with buttons that at least makes blooping sounds, and possibly speaks in a robotic monotone. Not a door.

So please, use the correct vocabulary, lest you turn a normally gentle writer into a vicious little animal who will point out your stupidity on her blog. With twenty followers.

*All definitions are courtesy of Dictionary.com. & laziness

**Commonly referred to as a "parking lot."

Way to Go, America

2011-10-03T17:42:00.000-07:00

Have you ever seen the movie "Meet the Robinsons?" There's this scene where Michael Yagoobian is discussing his descent into becoming a very tall, very thin, very angry villain who will eventually befriend a bowler hat. He walks down the school hallways carrying a binder with a pretty pink pony, his eyes on the floor, and looking back on this time, comments: "They all hated me."

That's pretty much how I feel, because no one voted on my NaNo ideas. Except I don't even have a pretty pink pony binder, and so the depths of despair darkening my heart yawn ever wider in a chasm that might never close, you guys. This abyss might remain agape forever.

For. Ev. Er.

Nothing could better illustrate that my readers are American than this FAILURE TO VOTE.

What you fail to realize, gentle, non-voting readers, is that your decision to behave like an American has taken away my right to do so by being indecisive and letting other people make my decision for me. This is my roundabout way of saying that I decided which idea to write about for NaNoWriMo - option #3: the Jane Austen continuation in the form of a modern re-make. Partially because I think I might actually have the ability to write a great Jane Austen spin-off. Primarily because it gives me an excuse to read about Jane Austen and re-read her works. Be warned: much Austen-related drooling is likely to occur within the forthcoming blog posts.

And I was able to come to a decision this time, but don't expect this to occur too often, guys. I am, after all, very patriotic.

America!

P.S. The above is only meant to be read in a jovial, joking manner. Although I do think it's a good idea to vote for important things - I mean, how ELSE will we know which is better: Coke or Pepsi?

Awesome T-Shirt

2011-09-28T08:08:00.001-07:00

Hey guys! Just in case you haven't heard of it yet, author Maureen Johnson is pimpin' a YA Saves t-shirt. There are numerous reasons you should buy this shirt:

1) It is, in fact, a very cute shirt. Dark blue, it will complement most skin tones. & with its' snappy font, you are sure to feel and look sophisticated and elegant as you stroll down the street.*

2) 100% of the proceeds from sale of this shirt are being donated to Reading Is Fundamenta l. Thus, you are doing your good deed for the day & supporting literacy. This particular charity also seems fitting this week, as it is Banned Books Week.

3) If you fail to purchase the aforementioned t-shirt, I make no promises that Ms. Johnson will not throw a rabid badger down your shirt front, thus ruining the shirt you are wearing now, and making a t-shirt purchase seem even more reasonable than it already does.

4) A t-shirt and jeans are good, all-American lazy fashion sense. Don't you love America?

5) This t-shirt is so cute, you should probably purchase TWO or THREE. One for yourself, one for back-up, and one for a gift. (*cough, cough* My birthday might be coming up in a few weeks *cough*)

Feel free to list EVEN MORE reasons why a purchase of the aforementioned shirt is necessary in the comments below...**

*Sometimes, I talk like a 60-year-old woman. Deal.

**Should you succeed in making me laugh, I will bake you virtual brownies.

2011-09-26T20:16:00.000-07:00

"'It's very important to take revenge. In the right way, of course. It doesn't mean you have to hurt anyone. But you act in a way that lets you keep your self-respect.'"

-Maxine Swann. The Foreigners.

As I mentioned previously, I recently finished reading Maxine Swann's The Foreigners. It's a beautiful book, and deals with different cultures and self-identity. This quote, in particular, jumped out at me as I was reading.

What I like about this quote is that it sums up why people like the idea of revenge. Revenge, often petty, is the subject of movies and TV shows, and we've all fantasized about it. There is a reason - it is about self-respect. It is about letting someone else know that they are not allowed to walk all over you. This is why scenes such as Veronica's smug look at the end of the pilot for Veronica Mars are so satisfying - they uphold the idea that revenge is possible, and that it feels great.

Not quite the smug look to which I was referring, but she definitely looks like she's enjoying her revenge.

Moreover, this quote brings up another aspect of "revenge" - that it must be done in "the right way." That it doesn't necessarily mean that you hurt anyone else, because revenge is more for yourself. I really liked this qualification. It's true - revenge is for you, which is why it can result in pettiness and get out of control. So it is important to limit yourself - to allow yourself to keep your self-respect, and feel better, but not to lose control of the situation or yourself in the process. This is why it is okay to verbally cut someone off who is being a complete asshole, but it is not okay to, say, shoot someone in the head for failing to say "Bless you." (I might have watched "Dogma" last night.)

I don't know that I'm advocating vengeance - I just like the manner in which this quote succinctly sums up what revenge should be, and why it is so appealing.

Let Us Talk of Things Foreign & Strange

2011-09-25T06:53:00.000-07:00

I was lucky enough to receive an uncorrected proof of Maxine Swann's The Foreigners.

The cover is pretty awesome, and people will think you're FAKING reading it b/c the chick is upside down.

Essentially, this novel is narrated by an American woman, recently divorced, named Daisy. Her name isn't really that important, however, and is really only rarely mentioned, in passing - she is a nameless American, going through a hard time, who has escaped to Buenos Aires to hopefully regain a sense of self. She meets some interesting people, such as Gabriel, the gay prostitute who has dropped out of med school and tells her she should "try everything."

Two people, in particular, are focused on, however - the Argentine native Leonarda, and the Austrian immigrant Isolde.

Isolde is awesome and elegant and lonely and figuring shit out, too. She likes to go to fancy cocktail parties with the elite circle of the rich and elegant, yet her sense of loneliness prevents her from being as successful in this circle as her ambition would like. She also suffers from monetary difficulties - for some reason, pretending to be rich when you're not can get costly and bankrupt you.

As opposed to being a mermaid and pretending to be human, which costs you physically and causes every step you take to feel as though knives are running through your body.

Leonarda, on the other hand, is NOT a foreigner, but wishes to be. She is smart, seductive, and unpredictable. She is wild, she wants to be revolutionary, and is always in the mood for change. Her temperament and appearance are extremely malleable, as well as her social circle. She hangs out with people in a dingy lab doing complicated things on her computer, and she dresses in luscious cocktail dresses and hobnobs with the sophisticated, rich, and famous.

Both Leonarda and Isolde help our heroine/protagonist/American character through providing glimpses into different lives, providing friendship, and expanding Daisy's horizons.

I really enjoyed this novel, despite its' rather aimless feel, and the fact that it doesn't really go anywhere. At the end of the novel, there is no grand epiphany, but the journey of the novel is an interesting, intelligent one.

One of the odd things about this novel is that the author Maxine Swann is from America, herself, yet the novel has the feeling of a novel that has been translated. There is a murkiness to the story. The words are all discernible, but the manner in which they are put together, while coherent, brings forth a slightly fuzzy picture in the readers' mind. I liked this quality, personally, but can see it proving irritating to some readers.

Another quality which did not particularly bother me, but that might bother the reader, is that, overall, I'm not entirely sure the characters are likeable. They're not necessarily unlikeable, but they're also not necessarily people you read about and think to yourself: "This person sounds awesome. I want them to spring forth from these pages because I feel certain we would be great things were this odd, magical happenstance to occur."

Still, as was previously mentioned, the cover, righted, looks like it's upside down. If nothing else, this book will confuse and befuddle fellow bus/train/subway passengers. And really, guys, isn't that what reading is all about?

The Secret Circle Pilot Recap

2011-09-24T14:23:00.000-07:00

I have a confession to make - as a teenager, there was little I loved more than reading a book by L.J. Smith. I am one of those die-hard fans who has been waiting over ten years for the Night World series to be brought to conclusion by Strange Fate (and since the release date keeps being pushed back, very well could be waiting ten more; admittedly, it is nice to see I am not alone in my frustration). I bought a set of pastels after reading the Dark Visions trilogy, and definitively discovered that my artistic talent is non-existent. I was kind of pissed that Jenny picked Tom over Julian. Repeatedly. (In the Forbidden Games trilogy.) Yet one of my favorite stories was that of shy Cassie Blake, who meets her soulmate, discovers her own inner power, and becomes strong and less shy in the course of The Secret Circle trilogy.

I was a little nervous when I learnt they had decided to make a Secret Circle television show. I mean, look at what they did with The Vampire Diaries. Don't get me wrong - the TV show is addicting -- but it doesn't follow the books.

The Secret Circle, on the other hand, isn't even a good TV show. The only thing they got right is the cliffhanger at the end. Anyway (note the lack of an "s," b/c I try to use proper grammar), I decided to try my hand at this whole recap thing. Here are my impressions of The Secret Circle pilot:

First of all, the beginning pissed me off. I guess it was supposed to be suspenseful and start the show off with a bang of something. I really felt, however, that in trying to make Cassie appear strong and resourceful (rather than the shy, awkward character she is IN THE BOOK), they really more managed to make her mother appear unintelligent and cliched. Her mother is at home, cooking dinner. Cassie called her, and kind of sounded, initially, like she wanted help. But obviously that's wrong. Because CASSIE knows how to change a tire, guys. She didn't get this from her mom, who can only sit on the side of the road, watching her daughter perform miraculous feats on her automobile. Except Cassie doesn't even want her mom to do that. Can't the woman just stay at home & have dinner ready when she's done with this manual labor?

Except Cassie's mother can't even do THAT right, because she gets killed by this guy who uses magic to conjure a fire. I mean, her mom doesn't really seem to try that hard to get out of the kitchen. But whatevs. It's "suspenseful," and she dies like she lived - in the kitchen. (Seriously, that "in the kitchen" shit REALLY bothered me.)

Then, the credits roll. & there's some really bad little girl singing a nonsensical song. I think it's supposed to sound magical and mystical or something, but it actually just seems clunky and overreaching.

OMG - Natasha Henstridge, from "She Spies!" I hope her character on this show is as awesome as Cassie ("She Spies" Cassie, not "Secret Circle" Cassie).

There's something a little disconcerting about all of these teen hangouts on television - like no small town just has a Taco Bell that all of the teens go to, like here in the real world. Taco Bell is awesome, cheap, and has food that is incredibly bad for you, guys. Its' greasy food helps exacerbate your acne, so that your teenage years are miserable and you are a target for ProActive infomercials. THIS IS THE WAY HIGH SCHOOL WORKS.

Where is the soulmate interaction between Adam & Cassie? That's what MAKES an L.J. Smith book. It's an important part of this series, and I wasn't even impressed by the "initial attraction" reaction between Adam & Cassie in this pilot. I mean, seriously, I'll take the ridiculous mooning looks that pass between Bill & Sookie in the "True Blood" pilot over the lackadaisical "I'm semi-attracted to you" bullshit I'm seeing on this show.

The spells on this show - or rather commands spoken in a deadpan manner to nature - seem really lame. There must be a way to make the magic on this show more interesting.

Overall, my impression is that the CW needs to fire the casting director for this show. I mean - ugh. Faye Chamberlain is played by a very pretty girl. But she doesn't seem like a bad girl. She talks way too much like a sweetheart to pull off the "bad girl" persona. Cassie is not shy enough, not sweet enough to be Smith's character. Maybe they gave her edge to make her more likeable, like they did with Fannie Price in "Mansfield Park." If that's the case, it didn't work. At times, Cassie is hard when it makes no sense for her to be. Yet, overall, I am exasperated at the fact that SHE IS NOT SHY. This characteristic is one of the initial definitive ones regarding Cassie Blake. Britt Robertson plays tough and cute very well - but she's not playing Cassie Blake. She's playing the same character I've seen her play before, except that it doesn't work as well with the dialogue for this show.

I DO plan to watch the next few episodes, to see if the show gets better. After all, the pilot is generally the most clunky episode of a television show. At the moment, however, I hold out little hope, and recommend that you read the book instead.

So, I Was Planning on Blogging More Frequently

2011-09-19T08:17:00.000-07:00

Seriously. I made a LIST of blog ideas and everything. I began to get ORGANIZED.

And then... um... yeah.

So, anyway, I'm finally blogging again. And this time, it's about NaNo. For those of you who don't know what NaNoWriMo is, let me briefly describe it:

A magical time that lasts for the duration of November, in which numerous writers voluntarily sign up to torture themselves and spur on the self-inflicted torture of others by agreeing to write a 50,000 word novel in 30 days.

Now, 50,000 words makes for an awfully short novel. It's really more of a novella when you're finished. It is also, however, a short draft which you can revise and make into something more novel-ly and wonderful. Some great novels that began as NaNo experiments are: Water for Elephants and The Night Circus.

I'm pretty sure you can't sign up for this month of awesome-sauce and sleep deprivation until October, but I recently sat down and did some brainstorming the other day.

You see, I have THREE ideas for NaNo projects this year. I thought brainstorming might help me come to a decision, but I was MISTAKEN. And so, gentle readers, I turn to you. Please, help me decide what to write about by casting a vote. Which of the following ideas sounds more like something you would want to chain yourself to for 30 days?

Option #1: ROAD RAGE

Tokyo Heiress, spoiled rich girl, has a pet peeve regarding proper driving. And when someone doesn't follow the rules of the road, she rams into their car, totaling both vehicles, because her parents can totally afford to buy her a new one, so why not?

Unfortunately, her parents decide to be totally not cool, and after a recent incident, have taken away her driving privileges and hired her a driver.

Unbeknownst to her parents, her driver has worse road rage than SHE does. And he doesn't necessarily follow driving laws himself, nor expect others to - he just wants everyone to recognize that the road is his.

Shenanigans ensue.

Option #2: AS-YET UNTITLED MYSTERY STORY

Female protag. lives on Ideal Street, but ironically deals with the desperate and despondent working as the front desk receptionist of a temporary agency. She herself is seeking different work because, frankly, working at a temp agency sucks and she doesn't make enough money to deal with this shit on a daily basis.

One day, whilst perusing Craigslist and making phone calls to fill a job order, she overhears a murder.

Except that no one believes her, the police having gone to the residence and ruled it as a suicide.

So female protag. will have to investigate this circumstance, herself.

The recently deceased was one of the few workers she actually enjoyed talking to on the phone and in the office. Plus, no one calls HER a liar...

Option #3: The Jane Austen Spin-off

This one will involve research. In case you haven't heard of it, Jane Austen was a few chapters into a new novel when she passed away. Most people call it Sanditon, because that was the residence at which the majority of the novel was to take place. Austen herself, however, was going to call it The Brothers. Basically, my idea is that a young woman finds herself living a life that draws many parallels to Sanditon/The Brothers - kind of a way to resolve/finish/sequel Austen's unfinished novel without actually poorly pretending to be her.

This one could be fun, and it would give me an excuse to re-read Austen, particularly that last work, as it's been awhile since I read it, and I would want to become familiar with it once more. I know that it had to do with hypochondriacs (of which I am one) and would probably place the new novel at a health resort or spa. Obviously, this one is the least fleshed out so far. Although I DO love Austen.

So - which idea do YOU like best? Please let me know in the comments below!

"Very Bad Men" Make for a Very Good Read

2011-08-23T04:09:00.000-07:00

Today, I am going to review Harry Dolan's novel Very Bad Men. A mystery novel possessing humor and heart, the suspense keeps the reader riveted - yet the most interesting aspects of the novel, rather than plot, are character. And I refrained from adding an "s" to character for a reason, for while the characters in the novel are the medium through which Mr. Dolan explores character, in general, it is the exploration itself which really intrigued me.

Here, have a book cover (& link to purchase the book, or read what some other literary geek had to say about it):

The book opens during the Ann Arbor Art Fair, a huge event that is really more like five art fairs all going on at the same time. The A3F brings a surge of tourists to the town of Ann Arbor, which makes it both a great source of income to local businesses, as well as really freakin' annoying to the people who live in Ann Arbor. Much, if not most, of downtown is closed off for small white tents displaying either art, food, or wares to be hawked. Also, people tend to indulge in a bit of child labor and force their children to sell water on street corners and such.

I love that the book uses this/these fair(s) as the initial setting - the beginning feels very like a horror movie. And there's Michael Myers, hiding in the midst of a throng of people, causing our hero to feel trapped even as he rushes after the villain. Because when I want to feel safe, I totally run straight towards the psychotic asylum escapee wielding a knife.

So there's murder, suspense, more murder, political intrigue, and a semi-solved incident that occurred many years prior.

The most interesting thing, however, is that Dolan pulled off a mystery novel in which the reader is aware the entire time of the identity of the murderer. The question of "Who" committed the murder is of no interest - it is a fact. The question of "Why" the murders are being committed, on the other hand, and of exactly how culpable the murderer is, is fascinating, and is explored in detail.

Another great thing about this novel is that all of the characters were enjoyable. All of them were fairly intelligent, most of them were good-looking, etc.

Something which I found even more interesting than the characters, however, was the setting. I know that I've mentioned the Art Fair, with its' enforced child labor and traffic jams, both vehicular and pedestrian. Yet, this time I'm referring to the setting of the entire book. Most of this book takes place in Ann Arbor. I currently live in Ann Arbor. It's a nice place, and there is something thrilling about reading a description and thinking: "I know that place!" There is something awesome about being able to accurately gauge whether or not the author is portraying the places mentioned, correctly (he did). Nearly every place Dolan mentioned in his novel, in Ann Arbor, is an actual place that I've been to, or walked past, and so reading this novel was comforting. As a resident of Ann Arbor, I almost felt like I was a part of the novel, myself, like I could pass David Loogan walking down the street.

So I am slightly biased, because the town in which I live is the setting. And as a current Ann Arbor resident, and University of Michigan graduate, I am a bit of a snob about Ann Arbor. I think it's a great place, and would, at the least, challenge someone to a duel who dared think otherwise.

Had the book not occurred in Ann Arbor, it still would have been thoroughly enjoyable. It still would have garnered praise. But I would not have liked it, as much.

Do you have any mystery book suggestions? I'm always looking for a good mystery! Let me know in the comments below.

A Literary Homage to Science Fiction

2011-08-07T15:30:00.000-07:00

Last week, I finished reading Felix de Palma's novel The Map of Time. I really think that this book is perfect for summer - it's long, it's elegantly written, but still an easy read, without being effortless.

Look! I'm the cover & I'm shiny & delicious!

The Map of Time is separated into 3 sections. Each section introduces some new characters, and sections two and three reveal different sides to characters who have already been introduced. There are two characters who play a prominent role in all 3 sections: Gilliam Murray, a fictional character of the author's device, and H. G. Wells, the actual science fiction writer.

This book was interesting, and really looks at the idea of time, and how the concept of time influences society. How would the world be different if it were possible to more properly comprehend the fourth dimension and "travel" through time?

The novel is set in the late 19th century, and is worded and intended to be read with that time period in mind. When reading, one becomes entrenched in a world that is more proper, in a world full of possibilities, despite the fact that this time period has already occurred, and therefore, it shouldn't be full of possibilities, at all.

I really enjoyed this novel. It's technically a translation, from Spanish into English, but the manner in which it is written reads as though it was written in English. The writing flows. I mentioned in a previous blog post that this book is perfect for summer - it's not what I would call "fluffy" writing, but it is enjoyable, and a fairly quick read, while still having enough intellectual meat to chew over.

I did have one problem with this novel: it's obvious infatuation with H.G. Wells. Sometimes, I felt as though the novel's entire structure was fabricated around the premise of paying homage to H.G. Wells. This adoration went so far as to lead to the denigration of other famed writers of the time period, including one of my personal faves, Henry James.

Other than that slight irksome recurrence, this novel is definitely worth reading. It's well written, it's intelligent, it's slightly nerdy, but in a mostly enjoyable way.

My Current Reading

2011-07-20T19:28:00.001-07:00

So I'm working on the Map of Time right now, written by Felix J. Palma. & so far, I'm loving it. Feel free to go to your local bookstore or library and pick up a copy to begin reading. It's not super heavy reading, but it's heavy enough to not be completely frivolous. It is also already a bestseller, though it was just released in its' English translation last month.

I've got to say, if I didn't pay attention, I might not even know this is a translation. It does not read as though it is lacking anything in character, and the words flow together beautifully. I cannot imagine the story being written in a better manner, though, of course, it is probably better in its' original form in Spanish.

Here are some of my favorite quotes from the book so far:

"...the passage of time, which transformed the volatile present into that finished, unalterable painting called the past, a canvas man always executed blindly, with erratic brushstrokes that only make sense when one stepped far enough away from it to be able to admire it as a whole."

“He could imagine no greater misery than to drift through life aimlessly, frustrated, knowing nothing could ever satisfy him, building a dull, meaningless existence on the basis of luck and a series of muddled decisions, an existence interchangeable with that of his neighbor, aspiring only to the brief, fragile, and elusive happiness of simple folk.”

“Sometimes she wondered whether she did everything in her power to overcome her gnawing sense of dissatisfaction, or whether, on the contrary, she derived a morbid pleasure from giving in to it.”

Feel free to dissect these quotes I enjoy, or share some of your own!

My First Ellen Hopkins Novel

2011-07-17T14:16:00.000-07:00

Today, I am going to review Ellen Hopkins' forthcoming adult novel Triangles. I was lucky enough to receive an Advanced Reading Copy, as the book is not for sale until October, 2011. The cover of my ARC copy is purplish and sexy:

This makes the cover fitting to the book, which is about middle-aged women grappling with family and sexuality issues. As the title suggests, this is the first book written by Ellen Hopkins which I have read.

I was rather surprised, initially, to discover that the book is comprised of poems. I wasn't sure I was going to like it. Yet the poetry reads quickly, and rather like prose, and I grew accustomed to it much faster than I anticipated.

The book chronicles a difficult time in the lives of 3 middle-aged women. Holly seems to have everything a woman could want - a stable home life, a husband who is still completely in love with her, and three good-looking children - but she's not satisfied. The big 4-0 is looming on the horizon, and she is feeling like she has not accomplished anything for herself. Marissa is dealing with a gay son and a sickly daughter who probably won't be alive much longer. Andrea is trying to convince herself that she doesn't need love in her life, but keeps finding herself entangled with men, anyway.

The book is often sad, sometimes uplifting, and often adventurous. The women are all interesting characters, and the reader does get to know them rather well.

It was an interesting book, and if you are a fan of Hopkins' YA work, then I think you will definitely want to check this out. I think it's also a great book, if you're in the mood to read about uncertainty and loss. Or if you're interested to see what a novel comprised of poems is like.

A Horror Movie & Character Development

2011-07-09T19:01:00.000-07:00

I recently watched "The Roommate," the horror movie with Leighton Meester and Minka Kelly about a horrible roommate. Except that the roommate was the character with whom I sympathized the most, although I'm sure you're supposed to feel bad that the super pretty, super talented, perfect girl Minka Kelly plays, whom everyone likes, is the one you're supposed to connect with, or whatever.

Honestly, Leighton Meester made this movie for me. And it wasn't by scaring me. It was through her vulnerability, and the fact that no one gave her what she needed the most: friendship.

Warning: the rest of this blog post is going to contain spoilers. Read at your own peril.

Suffice it to say, Leighton Meester is the only actor in that movie. Which is surprising, because I'm usually a pretty big Billy Zane fan, and he has a part in this movie - but I just didn't feel that he did a very good job in this movie. Billy Zane gave a lukewarm performance, and Minka Kelly got to play the pretty girl whom everyone adores automatically, b/c that's just the way some girls are received...

So maybe I didn't respond well to this film b/c I wasn't one of those girls. I'm kind of shy, and I've never been the kind of person who people just flock around. I've never been the kind of girl who gets invited to a party the first day she meets someone, and I've never had a good experience at a frat house, and all of the boys I dated in college were losers who didn't go to my school.

I was actually treated a lot more like Rebecca, Leighton Meester's character. There is something in me, a reserve, that sprung up unawares sometime during the period that I was growing up, that convinces people I am stuck up rather than shy. This is the vibe I got from Leighton Meester's character. Even before she said anything, before she had a chance to be mean or rude and deserving of being shunned, she was treated oddly and people whispered that she was scary within hearing range.

The two girls that she obsesses about are the girls whom she wants to be, because they are loved by all. (Who doesn't want to be loved?) And so she struggles to be nice to them, and goes a little bit overboard b/c she has a mental illness, and their response is to tell her she was never their friend.

That's just mean.

Is it really necessary, to shatter whatever normal, human part of her exists by taking all of their interaction that was truly on friendly terms, and making it meaningless?

She has a mental illness, she needs to go to a hospital, not be mocked by "normal" people, who are really just as heartless as they think she is.

For what did Aly Michalka's character Tracy do, that was so worthy of friendship? Invite Sara to a few parties, get too drunk, and abandon her at a nightclub? Oh. Yeah. That sounds like a winner. Like someone who cares.

I don't understand this mentality that a person has to be "cool" all the time. Like, if you're really my friend, you'll be there for me and have my back, but don't tell me that or act like that unless you're drunk.

Leighton Meester's Rebecca did exactly that - whatever she thought her friend needed. She tried to give her friend Sara what she wanted, even when what she wanted was ridiculous. And all she wanted in return was a friend.

For which she was shot and killed.

So who was the real murderer in the movie? The girl with the mental illness who thought she was doing what her friend needed? Or the girl whom everyone adored who didn't do the rational thing and talk to her roommate's parents or, at the least, her hall monitor about any issues she was having?

Delicate, Erotic & Unraveling

2011-06-21T09:35:00.000-07:00

The adjectives chosen to title this post refer to the book I just finished reading: Netsuke, by Rikki Ducornet. An interesting novel, that delves into the life of a psychoanalyst particularly interested in seducing his patients, or allowing his patients to seduce him, for therapeutic value.

I am reviewing an uncorrected galley, provided by the publisher. My opinions are my own, uninfluenced, because my brain's a pretty hard one to control. ;)

For the length of time which this book covers, it is clear the the psychoanalyst has been indulging in his studies for some time. He has had several failed marriages previous to the novel's beginning, and admits that he is extremely neglectful towards his current wife in favor of the flavor of the moment.

The psychoanalyst is not merely obsessed with the concept of sex, and how it can destroy or heal another person. He also becomes infatuated several times throughout the course of the novel with a certain client, and makes it clear that, at one time, he was infatuated in such a way with his wife.

It is clear, almost from the beginning, that the psychoanalyst is at least as disturbed as his patients. It is unclear whether or not he is actually affording any of his clients any help. He is trying to save himself through lustful encounters, trying to find the right person who can save him, and convincing himself that what he is doing is naughty, but helpful to the other people in his life.

The writing style in this novel is very interesting. It meanders a bit. There are very short chapters. It is, in fact, a very short novel. Yet it is pleasant to read. While the exact ending was not a foregone conclusion, the entire novel is heading towards an unpleasant ending.

I enjoyed reading this novel, which was released last month. The author has written eight novels, though this was the first of hers that I've read. I'm curious, now, to read some of her other material.

This novel got me thinking, and dealt with some issues which interest me. The concept of an obviously very intelligent individual indulging in self-destructive behavior is one that is come across often in life, and it was interesting to see it in this novel. It was that concept, however, more than the sex which was interesting. This is not erotica - the novel deals with sex, often, but is unlikely to turn you on. This is a book meant to challenge your intellect, rather than stimulate your libido. And it is worth reading.

An Austen-Affiliated Novel I Didn't Hate

2011-06-13T22:15:00.000-07:00

Today, I am going to review Karen Joy Fowler's The Jane Austen Book Club.

I was initially worried, upon embarking on the journey of reading this novel. I had heard, from a therapist a few years ago, that this book wasn't very good. I believe her words were, "They just read Jane Austen books. It was boring."

And then the movie came out, and it looked cute, so a friend and I rented it and watched it. I liked it, and this caused me to consider reading the book.

There was one more factor that caused me to be reluctant at the idea of reading this book, however: its affiliation with Jane Austen.

I love Jane Austen's books. Every single one of them is enjoyable - witty, realistic, romantic. Unfortunately, most of the more recent books that have been published by fellow Austen-enthusiasts have been horrible. I realize that it is difficult to write a book worthy of the great author from the nineteenth century, and authors who try deserve credit for their endeavor, but I don't like being repeatedly disappointed, either.

In this case, I wasn't. I thoroughly enjoyed this book. The characters are all interesting, and described in a captivating way that makes the reader want to avoid putting the book down at all costs.

The one thing that was kind of weird about the book was the narration style. Primarily told in the third person, the narration tends to focus on one, or only a couple, of the characters. There were times, however, when a plural second person point of view was used. So I, as the reader, felt as though I was being addressed by one person in the group, talking about everyone in the group, but in actuality, it was the narrator, who was not in the reading group. It felt kind of voyeuristic, stalkerish, and wrong.

But the novel, overall, is very good. It's one of those magical books that just makes you feel good, even when it recounts bad things happening. It reminds me of Alice Hoffman's books, which are permeated with fantastical creatures and those realistic magic moments that are in our lives.

Since Jane Austen's novels all involve love and courtship, the characters, through reading and discussing the six books Ms. Austen wrote, realize issues in their own love lives. The reading of Austen's books are healing, and feel like a healing balm to the reader, as well.

This book is great, and I strongly recommend it to anyone who has read Ms. Austen's books, is interested in reading Ms. Austen's books, or who loves love. The book is, perhaps, a bit esoteric - it is definitely easier to follow if you HAVE read Ms. Austen's books. But there are summaries of the Austen books, if you haven't read them.

Respect & Decorum Are a Dead Thing when the Customer is Always Right

2011-06-01T07:43:00.000-07:00

The woman's hair was more frizz than curl.

She wore an oversized t-shirt that severely accentuated her thinness, and a pair of baggy jeans that could not have felt good in the eighty degree heat outside.

She walked up to the garish orange counter* with an older, portly, balding, rotting-toothed gentleman and slammed her DVDs on the counter before spouting off the seven digits of her phone number in a steady, monotonous stream of syllables.

This behavior was jarring to Alecia, the 21-year-old fashion school student who thought to herself once more that she really needed to get a job in the retail environment tailored to clothing. She forced her the corners of her lips up and out into a smile. "Hello," she said pleasantly, as she grabbed the movies, and removed the security precautions. "How are you today?"

"All them movies I kin git for five nights, I wan' for five nights," the woman said, her smoke-clogged voice as rough and abrasive as her movements.

"Okay," Alecia responded. "It looks like the only movie that will be due back tomorrow night before we close is 'Drive Angry.' Your total is five dollars even."

The woman handed over a Chase debit card. Alecia flipped it over to behold a darkened, scratched out slip on the back. "May I please see your ID?" she asked.

"I DON' HAVE MY ID!" the woman screamed. Alecia wondered how many times over the past few days the woman had been asked to corroborate that she was herself. "I am waiting for it in the mail."

Isn't it amazing how much more articulate some people become when angry?

"Okay..." Alecia said, thinking to herself that this was exactly the way that someone who was stealing identification or up to something fishy would react. "Do you have any other ID, at all?"

"If this is going to be a big deal," the woman said, digging through her purse, her shoulders jerking with her abrupt movements. She retrieved a crumpled twenty dollar bill from the depths, and flung it at the girl behind the counter.

Alecia returned the debit card. "I'm sorry; it's just difficult to make out your signature."

"Not really," the woman said, in the exasperated tone usually reserved for police officers and IRS agents.

Alecia forced a small breath. In and out. "Maybe your eyesight is better than mine," she said. In and out. "Though, given the way you look, I doubt it."

"What did you just say to me?!"

Fuck breathing. "You know what? You're right. The first thing I thought when I woke up this morning was, I'm going to make Tanya Roberts' life difficult today! Seriously. I don't even know you. You know what? When you're the victim of credit card fraud, remember this incident, and the countless others like it. I don't think you're a criminal; I was trying to protect you from those who are."

"What's your name?"

"Fred."

"Fred." The woman sounded as if she didn't believe Alecia.

"Yup. 'Drive Angry' is due back tomorrow; you have everything else until Monday. Enjoy."

The woman seemed a bit flustered as she left the store. So flustered, she forgot to get her change. Alecia deemed it a tip and stuck it in her pocket.

*You could tell a man chose the color scheme, with its' bright orange and green hues.

Disillusionment with the Alpha-Male Art World

2011-05-31T23:07:00.000-07:00

I recently read Art and Madness: A Memoir of Lust Without Reason. It was a book which I received free of charge from the publisher. It was fan-freakin'-tastic.

Seriously. I loved it.

Other than having a great title, this book is written with style, and a simple gracefulness. I am usually not a fan of non-fiction, including memoirs. This memoir, however, was one that I didn't want to put down.

For one thing, the subject matter is scintillating. This memoir deals with Roiphe's dedication to, and subsequent disillusion with, the literary art world in the '50s & '60s. This was a time in which men were still drinking with abandon, and striving to become the next literary great. Being this time period, and the art world, there is also a lot of discussion about sex, about love. Roiphe brings this world alive - its' pulse beats steady, and it breathes easily, and the reader slips into this world like a hand into a glove.

It was also my introduction to Roiphe. I am slightly abashed at the fact that I wasn't very aware of Roiphe's prolific-ness until becoming interested in this memoir. Now, I feel like I need to purchase every book she's written, because if they are as good as Art and Madness, I will be a very happy reader while devouring them. Roiphe is extremely intelligent. She grapples with issues on an intellectual and emotional level, and the reader can follow her train wreck of issues while still being awed at the fact that she is so smart. She also writes in a beautiful manner. Her writing in this memoir is slightly stream-of-consciousness - skipping around a bit in time, jumbling close together in run-on sentences, going to the brink of incoherent without ever quite losing that bright silver thread of narrative - and just lovely to read. Reading her memoir reminded me somewhat of Francesca Lia Block. Not because their writing is identical, but because with both women, I feel almost like I'm reading poetry while reading their prose.

I could babble on about this book for much longer, but I'm sure I would start to bore you (if I haven't done so already), so I will simply conclude my review with this recommendation: buy it. If the subject matter interests you at all, buy it. If you like strong, lyrical prose, buy it. If you like Anne Roiphe, buy it. If you are a fan of art, buy it. I seriously doubt you will regret it.

Opposition to the Idea of Marriage

2011-05-26T09:33:00.000-07:00

A silly institution,

bringing to fruition

the condition

that we are taught on television

is the natural romantic relation.

The perfect white dress

is the start of a mess.

The vow "until death"

just causes stress;

it's cultural duress.

I don't want this cage.

It puts me in a rage

this desire is attributed to young age;

I'll feel the same when a sage.

You see,

historically,

getting married

pre-

vents women being free.

The man was king,

for he had the money,

and fe-

males re-

sorted to goldigging,

but it was okey

so long as she got a ring.

The continuance

of this nuisance

we succumb to like puissants

is not merely an acceptance,

but also an upholdance,

that past trespasses

on the female race,

while (often) currently in recess,

are our inheritance

because it still holds resonance.

If you think it's right

that women be in the plight

in which they have no rights,

and aren't allowed to fight

for an end to such blight,

then fine.

Get married.

Link to A Contest

2011-05-24T12:33:00.000-07:00

Alice Marvels is hosting a contest that gives you the opportunity to win one of 8 signed copies of new Young Adult books or a Kindle. Here's the link: http://www.alicemarvels.com/spring-giveaway

Quote Analysis

2011-05-17T14:35:00.000-07:00

"It wasn't so much desire that led me as my intention not to live like a coward. I was determined to take what life would offer. I didn't want to be the only woman of my generation to hold to standards everyone else had long ago abandoned."

-Anne Roiphe. Art and Madness: A Memoir of Lust without Reason. New York: Nan A. Talese, Doubleday, 2011. 19.

I just began reading this book, and I'm already in love with it. The quote above is something that I know I have felt and thought, and that I have a feeling most people go through.

For how do we want to live life? Do we want to strive for an excellence that might not be achievable? I mean, I'm sorry, but the fact is we can't all be rich and famous. Celebrity depends upon and only means something when there is the mediocre, those yearning, the proletariat with which to compare.

So we can strive for whatever we want, but there's never a guarantee that we will achieve it. I can write until my fingers are knobbed and shaking with arthritis, and my wrists crack from carpel tunnel syndrome, but that doesn't mean I'll strike that lucky vein (or marketing team) that Stephenie Meyer did and be able to make a living from it. In fact, with all of these changes recently in the publishing world, it will probably only become harder for the diamonds to glitter among the rough (I'm not saying my work is any good, just that I think a lot more crap is going to be published with the increase of book piracy).

Do we go with what's safe? Can we trust what our parents tell us? All parents do their best, but the fact is that the world changes. People's attitudes generally don't, but it certainly seems that their morals do. The shy, smart girl is generally just considered a stuck-up bitch who won't put out, rather than chased and admired from afar like some John Hughes movie.

Sometimes, we just have to face our fears. That's the only way we can change, the only way that we can improve. For sometimes, we're not perfect just the way we are. To anyone.

And usually, when we feel the safest, that's when we need to change the most.

Anywho, that's what this quote got me thinking about. What about you? There's a lot of meat there, just begging to be chewed over... (Which is my way of saying, please comment below; I'd love to hear your thoughts!)

Excerpts from an Interview You Should Read

2011-04-29T19:17:00.000-07:00

I just read this article on the Writer's Digest website. It's an interview with Harlan Coben, and I found it very inspiring. Here are a few of my favorite quotes:

"I want it to be compulsive reading. So on every page, every paragraph, every sentence, every word, I ask myself, 'Is this compelling? Is this gripping? Is this moving the story forward?' And if it's not, I have to find a way to change it... No word should be wasted."

"That's what a good crime novelist - any good novelist - should do with you; play with your perceptions while showing you everything in plain sight."

"...the actual process [of writing], the day-to-day suffering, the day-to-day self-doubt, the day-to-day self-hatred, that's pretty much always the same."

"None of my books are ever just about thrills, or it won't work."

"You can't get lost in your own genius, which is a dangerous place for writers. You don't want to ever get complacent."

"You have a choice: You can either hate yourself, or you can write."

On Borrowing Things

2011-04-29T16:01:00.000-07:00

Rebecca Makkai's novel The Borrower comes out in June of this year, and my opinion of this book can be summed up in two words: Buy it.

The tale of a highly intelligent librarian in her mid-twenties, who, though not exactly possessing the degrees requisite to do her job does it far more competently than anyone else there, "borrows" a ten-year-old boy. Technically, narrator Lucy Hull commits kidnapping that crosses several state lines for reasons that are somewhat idealistic.

I love, love, loved the narrator. She was witty, and based on the reactions of several other characters to her, very pretty, but completely misguided. As the reader, I felt as though Lucy could have or do whatever she wanted - but she didn't know what she wanted. & she didn't particularly care that she didn't know what she wanted, or that she wasn't entirely sure of what she was doing. As someone in her mid-twenties whose life goals seem to change somewhat everyday, and who, at times, wishes she was pretty, slutty, & enough of an actress to act stupid enough to become an object of infatuation for Hugh Hefner, I have to say - I could identify with many aspects of Miss Hull's life.

I also loved the young boy whom she took on an unplanned road trip. (Kidnapping is a somewhat harsh term to describe the situation that occupies the majority of the narrative of this book.) An adorable boy named Ian who is a voracious reader and seems inclined towards a sexuality different from heterosexuality, he is the child of two very strict parents who take him to weekly anti-gay classes with a man who claims to have formerly been homosexual and now saved.

It is interesting to see the narrative from the side of the villain - which is how Miss Hull describes herself in the beginning of the narrative. I particularly like that this is one villain you don't want to get caught. I didn't necessarily agree with everything she believed - I just didn't want her to get caught. At the end of the narrative, I wasn't sure that I even agreed with Miss Hull's assessment of herself as a villain.

All-in-all, an extremely entertaining & intelligent read that explores many aspects of the concept of "borrowing." Seriously, buy it. Here's a link so you can pre-order it now.

Fairy Tales - Literally

2011-04-20T11:11:00.000-07:00

I recently finished the novel Don't Breathe a Word by Jennifer McMahon.

I really enjoyed it. This was another book that skipped around in time - every chapter took place in a different decade. The book chapters also each featured a different protagonist - the more modern ones featured a woman in her thirties named Phoebe, the chapters from 15 years prior feature a young girl named Lisa.

At the crux of the story lies the mystery of what, exactly, happened to a 12-year-old girl named Lisa, who disappeared one summer. The most logical train of thought - 12-year-old girl disappears and has been missing for 15 years - isn't pretty. The flashbacks and the interesting people Phoebe and her boyfriend (who happens to be Lisa's younger brother) Sam encounter when the possibility that Lisa's returned, however, makes the reader question this concept of reality.

Lisa was an interesting little girl - very pretty, very imaginative, and one of those people that other people tend to like. & Lisa believed in fairies.

In fact, the summer that she disappeared, Lisa thought she was contacting fairies, and was going to be brought into the fairyland to become Teilo (the fairy king) 's queen.

So 15 years later, Sam and his cousin Evie begin receiving strange messages and encountering odd situations that seem like the sorts of things that fairies who are complete assholes might be perpetrating, & have to wonder - was Lisa right? Was she in the fairy kingdom for 15 years? & is she now back?

I really, really enjoyed this book. For some reason, the length of the book surprised me (464 pages). The novel still read very quickly, however, while not being insipid or stupid. This isn't really a beach read, but I do recommend reading it.

There was one thing that sometimes irked me about the book - the protagonist changes. Every chapter had that different focus - one for Phoebe, one for Lisa - and sometimes, it was a little jarring. I think, however, that it did actually work in the way that the author intended. When you're discussing subjects such as child kidnapping, possible rape, murder, and not-very-nice fairies, jarring the reader a little bit is a good thing.

So it's a serious book, and it questions the concepts of reality and perception. Really, at the end of the book, I was slightly spooked, though while reading the majority of the book I wouldn't say it was a horror story.

If you're interested in reading some more about the book, other reviews, or pre-ordering, the author's website is here. The book is being released in May of this year.

Popping My Cherry

2011-04-07T08:56:00.000-07:00

I had never read a novel by Kristin Hannah before, (that's right, get your minds out of the gutter,) and was lucky enough to receive an advanced reading copy of her new book night road recently.

I think I've found a new great author. A lot of you have probably read her work before (you guys - so smart), but if you haven't, I strongly suggest checking this book out:

I hesitate to summarize this book, because honestly, I feel like a summary would make me less inclined to want to purchase the novel. I'll do my best, but I want to preface the summary with a warning that my words are not very likely to do the novel justice:

The book skips around in time a bit, covering a span of about 8 (9? 10? I'm bad at math) years. It mostly chronicles three teenagers who are friends, lovers, helpers, fighters, etc. Some great things happen; some horrible things happen. Overall, however, (& this is going to sound so corny, but doesn't come across that way in the book at all) this book really reinforces the idea that love is a healing, wonderful thing.

It deals with issues of love, parenthood, abandonment, depression, and martyrdom.

Basically, you really need to read it. Go buy it. Now.

Has anyone else read Kristin Hannah? What are your thoughts (on any of her works)? Let me know in the comments!

A YA Book I Didn't Much Like

2011-04-01T11:01:00.000-07:00

I recently received an ARC of brother/sister by Sean Olin.

I didn't much like it.

In fact, I didn't finish it. In general, I try to make a point of finishing a book sent to me for review. At times, however, as a reader, I just know when a book isn't for me. This was one of them. After diligently plowing through more than 50 pages, I decided to follow a Pearl of wisdom & quit.

The novel is narrated by two siblings, a brother & a sister (just like in the title! It must be a coincidence, right?), named Will & Asheley (yes, that's really how her name is spelled). When the book opens, we as readers know that something terrible has happened. As the story keeps unfolding, we realize that someone is dead and that the siblings are in Mexico. They are talking to the police, and it seems that one or both of them is the suspect with regards to the death. The kids are isolated and kind of weird - the result of divorced parents and an alcoholic mother - and a day when both of them accomplish sports feats, they are also shamed by actions by their mother and boyfriend.

Each chapter is narrated by a different sibling, and the story itself isn't that bad. I didn't, however, like the writing style. I didn't like the characters of Will and Asheley, and I didn't like the way that the story was taking for. ev. er. to unfold. It was like it took five chapters to relate an hour time span. Like much of America, I have ADD - I don't have the attention span for this.

So the stuff happening was interesting, but honestly, I don't even care that I don't know exactly who was murdered, or how, by whom, etc. So the interesting stuff was not related in an interesting way, and that makes this a book that I wouldn't recommend.

Another Disappointment

2011-03-30T09:35:00.000-07:00

A few weeks ago, I finished reading The Revenge of the Radioactive Lady by Elizabeth Stuckey-French. With a title like that, I expect it's going to pique the interest of a lot of readers. It's also got an arresting retro cover:

In a nutshell, TROTRL is about an elderly woman who has suffered health issues as well as the death of her daughter because of radioactive cocktails she was given in the fifties. These cocktails were part of an unofficial study, and the women who drank them (all in the lower economic stratus) were told that it was a "vitamin cocktail." Bitter and alone, this particular woman (named Marylou) has decided that she needs to get revenge on the doctor who was in charge of the study. So she buys a house in Tallahassee, begins essentially stalking the doctor and his family, and contemplates the best way to kill him. Sounds like a great, fast, zany read, right?

Wrong.

This novel has all the potential to be crazy & amazing, but instead, wallows in the mundane. Some crazy shit happens, but the manner in which it is related makes it seem almost boring & nondescript, while more time & care is spent on the small and everyday. The marketing, the title, the synopsis all indicate something wacky, along the lines of a Christopher Moore novel or that novel I adore, Fated.

It's not a bad book. It looks through the eyes of a lot of different characters, really giving both sides of the story, and all-in-all, the book and the author have a good heart. It wasn't, however, what I was expecting, and what I was expecting was more interesting than what I read.

Hopefully the Movie's Better

2011-03-10T19:39:00.000-08:00

The commercials for the Red Riding Hood movie coming out soon intrigued me. I mean, sure, chances are it's as horrible as the Twilight movies. But the possibility that it isn't is exciting. & as you know (or are about to find out), a YA novel was recently released as a "companion" to the movie. So you know I bought it. Here's the cover (which I adore):

I was really hoping to like this book. I like fairy tales. I like new twists on fairy tales.

I also, however, like good writing. This book didn't have that particular characteristic.

I liked the ideas & I could have liked the characters, if they had been fleshed out a bit more. The story is mostly told from Valerie's point of view, in a meandering fashion that makes her seem extremely indecisive and somewhat flaky.

Basically, the writing is very simple. That's not always a bad thing. A lot of great writers write in simple sentences. It's concise, and often beautiful in it's lack of unnecessary complication. So it's not really the simplicity that bothers me - it's that the simplicity is paired with a lack of sophistication. There's no grace to the story. One sentence wobbles along after another, like a toddler learning to walk. It is clumsy and sometimes completely misses the mark and falls on its' butt.

There were two sentences that I liked:

"Valerie was not who she had been. She felt parts of herself softly crumbling off, like a cliff falling into the sea."

That was it. The others sentences revealed too little or revealed too much or just didn't strike my intellect in an appealing way.

Have you read Red Riding Hood? What was your opinion?

A Glimpse into a Different Perspective

2011-02-22T09:40:00.000-08:00

I just finished reading Minding Ben by Victoria Brown.

I think it's a good thing that I read this book, but I don't know that I would have wanted to pay money for it. Intellectually, it was something interesting for me to read. Based on Brown's own experiences, the book details a girl from a Trinidadian island who comes to America at 16, is abandoned by her own family, and has to find her own way. If she goes back home, she won't ever be able to come back to America, and because America has more opportunities than her life back home would, she's willing to put up with A LOT of shit from the American trademark: the asshole.

Since I am not an illegal immigrant from a warm location where life can seem stagnant and never-changing, I could not really relate. That is why I think that reading this book was a good experience for me. It really opened my eyes a bit. Sometimes, people, at times, have falsely accused me of being a grammar Nazi. I'm totally not - mostly because my comprehension of grammar isn't good enough to reach that level of tyrrany - but I do like for a sentence to be well put together. So initially, a lot of the dialogue kind of irked me. In fact, if anyone who has grown up in America had written this, I would have called it pretentious and overbearing. But the writer didn't put her dialogue together in the manner that she did to make fun of anyone - it's based on her personal experiences. Once I thought about it that way, I realized I was being a bitch and that I deserved the eye-opening.

I felt like the book was realistic, but I also felt that it was slightly meandering. The plot did not seem tightly constructed. Now, those of you who have been reading my blogs for awhile or who know me in person already know I have ADD, so about halfway through the book, I was wishing I was done and anticipating the next novel on my TBR list (which kept changing, by the way, and culminated in Red Riding Hood).

One of my other problems was the strength I previously mentioned: I really didn't understand the protagonist Grace. I haven't lived through her life experiences, of course - but it wasn't just that. I have empathy. I really like to be able to put myself in the character's shoes. And Grace just didn't seem to add up correctly. Smart, adventurous, headstrong - I get that. But I only get that impression from what other characters say to her. I don't see it in her actions. In fact, Grace repeatedly perpetrates actions which give me the exact opposite impression of her. This character ambiguity, in particular, really irked me.

So, like I said earlier, I'm glad that I read the book. I feel like it broadened my horizons. Yet, I don't know that I recommend buying the book.

First Blog of February - WHOO!

2011-02-02T11:36:00.000-08:00

Now that I have seen "Stripped to Kill," I thought I would do a quick review of the movie.

I'm sure that many of you who, like me, like to watch horrible movies so you can laugh & make fun of them, wanted to watch the movie simply b/c of the title.

Well, if you love horribly campy '80s movies, this flick is definitely suited to your tastes. If, on the other hand, you're more into current pop culture or movies that are actually good & might withstand the test of time, avoid this movie at all costs.

First of all, there are a lot of long stripper sequences. My comment, while watching, was that "They're not dancing - they're doing gymnastics" - which is great for a strip club, but still. I felt like I was watching girls whose former dreams of Olympic gymnastic competition were quashed, and the logic of this film dictated that their only course of action was to subsequently hump a stripper pole.

Then, there's the hard-ass female protagonist cop, who's convinced to try out for amateur night as an undercover & get all the information the strippers don't want to tell the cops by her partner (as a joke). B/c strippers don't trust cops, you guys. Not even when they're being killed off, one by one.

The best part of the movie, in my opinion, is the amateur night scene wherein female protagonist cop (fpc) "dances" for the first time... That scene, to be fair, is not gymnastic, either. It's just terrible. I didn't even know it was possible to lack the amount of rhythm that is portrayed in the movie. It's almost painful to watch it... & definitely funny.

There's also this awesome dialogue, such as:

mpc: I can't handle all this emotional stuff.

fpc: Then make me stop.

mpc: How do I do that?

fpc: You're a cop; figure it out.

(leads to make-out scene)

The end of the movie wrapped up extremely quickly, and I was left with the same sort of abrupt feeling by the very ending that I received upon first reading the Iliad & the Aeneid. Due to the campiness of the movie, I doubt that this was done with any attempt at literary pretension. It was probably done b/c a popular TV ending to shows in the '70s & '80s was to end on a freeze frame very shortly after the suspense was lifted.

To any interested parties, there is a sequel.

Have you seen the movie? I'd love to hear your thoughts in the comments! Or about any campy movies you've seen - particularly if they're hilarious!

The Power of a Great Title

2011-01-17T19:27:00.001-08:00

I was innocently perusing the aisles of Family Video with the fiance, when he noticed that Shaft in Africa is on sale: $2.95 for the movie by itself, or 2 for $4 if we found another movie that doesn't rent well from the 2 for $1 section. Because I was feeling indulgent, like Mildred Pierce, I decided to get my fiance what he wanted & hope that he wouldn't kill someone & blame it on me later.

Obviously, we HAD to look for another movie. I mean, why pay an extra 95 cents when you can pay an additional $2? That's right - we're saving the American economy, people.

As we continued searching, I came across this:

I showed it to the fiance, who was all: "We have to get that!" & since I agreed, we did.

Now, I haven't SEEN Stripped to Kill yet, but with a title like that, it's obviously pretty freakin' hilarious. & so it got me thinking about titles.

I literally bought this movie b/c the title promises so much enjoyment being added to my life. Unfortunately, I pretty much suck at titling my stories - I am way too unoriginal to come up with a gem such as Stripped to Kill. Often, however, unless an author has an arresting cover (which, let's face it, authors basically have no control over. & by basically, I mean definitely), the title of a work is one of the first things the public sees.

So if I have a crazy-fun romp of a tale wherein the protagonist caves in to any & all road rage before having her car taken away by parents who finally decided to parent & is then subjected to the whims of being chauffeured by someone with even worse road rage... but just title it ROAD RAGE... it probably won't reach the audience intended, or as vast an audience as it could receive.

Does anyone have any suggestions with regards to titling projects?

Maybe next time, I should write down adjectives describing my project on slips of paper and randomly draw a predetermined number from a hat, then smush them together into a title. Or insert the word "ninja" into all my titles, especially when there are no ninjas in the story at all. Yeah. I should probably totally do that.

Murder Mystery Mayhem!

2011-01-14T12:04:00.000-08:00

I recently finished reading The Devotion of Suspect X by Keigo Higashino.

Scheduled to be published February 2011

When I began the novel, I had no idea what to expect, other than that it was a mystery, it revolved around a murder, and it was supposed to be "really good."

I used quotes around "really good," though it's really a paraphrasing, b/c I like a great mystery as much as the next person, but I don't think that I necessarily look for the same things in a mystery to cause me to qualify it as great. (Say that last sentence ten times fast on camera, post it on YouTube, and you'll be my hero. & probably suffering from lack of oxygen.)

In general, however, when I think of a mystery, it is a puzzle which the reader, as well as the protagonist, is supposed to solve.

This book wasn't like that.

In this book, in fact, I didn't particularly feel that there was one specific protagonist. There were many characters whom I grew to care about, the detective, perhaps, least of all.

The Devotion of Suspect X revolves around the murder of a man named Togashi, the ex-wife whom he was seeking, the neighbor who is infatuated with the ex-wife, a few detectives, and a very smart physicist-assistant-professor at a local university. The book feels like a battle of wits, an elaborate chess game from which only one man may emerge the victor, waged between two men of genius (infatuated neighbor Ishigami & physicist-asst-prof Yukawa).

It is so much more than that, however. As I said, you grow to care about the characters, and I feel that this book, particularly towards the end, really shows the difference between logic and emotion. Much of the discussion in the book is so logical, that it could quickly devolve into an almost sociopathic view of a murder. Higashino does a very good job, however, of reminding the reader that the discussion involves humans, and that all people matter, regardless of how much personal interaction occurs between them.

Overall, I felt that this book was a solid read. I particularly liked the ending. I also enjoyed the intellectual discussions.

I did not feel the push to read this book that sometimes occurs from reading thrillers where a THE-SUSPENSE-IS-KILLING-ME-I-NEED-TO-KNOW-WHAT-HAPPENS-NEXT often consumes the reader and causes voracious page-flipping and staying up into the wee hours of the night. I am not sure if that is due to the translated nature of the book, however. At times, I felt that the translation was different - inevitably, of course, the translation will be different, but at times, there was a jarring effect that a reader does not want to feel.

Still, if you're a mystery fan, or a genius fan, this book is definitely worth reading.

This Book Will Have You Humming Beatles' Songs

2010-12-31T08:23:00.000-08:00

I just finished The Girl Who Became the Beatles, a clever, fast-paced YA novel written by Greg Taylor.

Released February 2011, TGWBAB is a very fun read. It relates the story of Regina Bloomsbury, a teenage musican whose band The Caverns is on the verge of breaking up when the novel begins. When a member of the band very publicly & embarrassingly & definitively does break up the band, Regina makes a wish that she was as famous as The Beatles.

And it comes true. Sort of.

She wakes up in an alternate, wish-world universe where her band The Caverns has replaced The Beatles (though The Monkeys still exist, oddly enough), because, as it turns out, it's impossible to be as famous as The Beatles without being credited with having created their music.

Despite the wish-come-true cliche that the book revolves around, the book avoids, for the most part, feeling too cliched.

Regina is an interesting person to be around, rather than an annoying twit like many of the YA heroines, &, as I mentioned previously, the book is geniunely fun to read.

I was humming a Beatles tune in the shower (which has been happening, nonstop, since I began reading this book) & didn't even know it until my fiance told me it woke him up (whoops).

I highly recommend this book as a frivolous, fun read, for teenagers or for adults.

A Love Letter to NYC

2010-12-27T12:11:00.000-08:00

Hello. *waving arms frantically* Today, I am going to be reviewing Susane Colasanti's So Much Closer, a young adult novel that will be released May 3, 2011.

This was my first Susane Colasanti book. I had heard of her before - she's a well-known YA author, and I had heard flattering things about her before. This book didn't seem that great to me.

Don't get me wrong - it wasn't that bad, either. It was somewhere in the middle.

The story is narrated by this girl named Brooke who's super smart - kind of. By super smart, I mean that she's really great at picking up concepts. She can do homework at the drop of a hat, without really trying. So she's a genius.

But she's a genius who does really, really stupid things - like intentionally get mediocre grades so that she'll "fit in." There's also some half-assed bullshit excuse for her reserved attitude - that when you get close to a guy, he dumps you. The backstory for that isn't fleshed out, but b/c the attitude towards the reader is somewhat reserved, as well, we don't really feel much impact from the few lines to such effect that Brooke tells us.

She doesn't have life figured out, and that's okay - she's in high school. Some people never figure their life out. It happens.

What's not so okay is that, at the beginning of the story, she lives in New Jersey with her bitter, single mother. & near the beginning of the story, she moves to New York City with the father she hasn't spoken to since he left her mom... because she's got a crush on a guy who has to move to New York b/c his dad got relocated.

Seriously?!

You're a fucking genius who has been in a not-s0-healthy relationship before, and you think it's totally okay to move to a new city for a guy who barely knows you exist?

So it's kind of like the TV show "Felicity," but on cocaine, b/c this chick is in high school, and like that freaky obsessive chick in Twilight that everyone likes - what's her name? Bellows?

ANYWAY -

Because protagonist Brooke is so freakin' pretty & has that stand-off attitude, of course, everyone loves her. & she does succeed in getting her supposed "soulmate" whom she hardly knows to notice & date her.

So the novel involves finding herself, figuring out what she wants from life & that it was completely retarded for her NOT to take advantage of her intelligence to help her get to where she wants to be.

But mostly, the novel feels like a large love letter to the city of New York. There are descriptions of what parts of New York look like & how cool it is. Descriptions of why New York is obviously SO much better than New Jersey. The book is dedicated to the city of New York, because the author loves it & so created a character to portray that love.

The novel is a quick read, and if you don't get easily annoyed with the protagonist when he or she is a dumb ass, go ahead & give it a try. Otherwise, I recommend you pass on reading So Much Closer.

2010-12-26T08:01:00.000-08:00

I recently received an uncorrected proof, special ARE of Lisa Genova's LEFT neglected. Lisa Genova wrote the bestselling novel Still Alice. Her new novel LEFT neglected will be released January 2011.

This book is....interesting. The cynic inside of me secretly thinks that it's entirely possible this novel was solicited by the police in an attempt to get drivers to stop using cell phones while they're driving.

The book tells the story of Sarah Nickerson, a woman who lives in a nice neighborhood, has three children, and is a very successful businesswoman. She likes the challenges and power that comes with her job, she wants to be a great mom, and balancing things is a bit difficult, if not impossible some days. Basically, Ms. Nickerson tends to feel that she either isn't devoting enough time to her family, or that she isn't devoting enough time to her work, though she simply keeps going, trying harder, pushing herself further. All very cliched things that you've read plenty of times in fiction before.

While the book feels like it's going for a "& she had to re-prioritize when her husband Bob filed for divorce papers" or "& she had to re-prioritize when she was fired from her job due to recession cuts," the book ACTUALLY goes towards something completely different:

She had to re-prioritize b/c she was fumbling for her cell phone & ended up crashing her SUV on the side of the freeway, bumping her head & ending up with a condition called "Left Neglect."

Frighteningly, left neglect is an actual brain trauma injury where the person wakes up and forgets that the left side exists. To anything. Like, you're looking at your house & you only notice the right side of the house. But you also don't realize anything's missing. You think that's the way your house has always been.

This injury, of course, makes Ms. Nickerson pretty alarmed & frustrated & the majority of the book is about her recovering & realizing that her life is never going to be the same.

I would say this book is all right. It's not amazing, it's not particularly elegant, & Sarah can be pretty annoying. Most people, however, are annoying at one time or another, and waking up with a traumatic head injury is probably one of the best reasons for getting pissy.

I would recommend this book if you like books that revolve around the medical community or if you like chick lit or if you're really bored & can get your hands on it, for free. Otherwise... you might want to pass.

Are You Being HAUNTED?!

2010-12-23T15:06:00.000-08:00

Or do you sit around pondering the philosophical implications of being haunted? And all of the ways that you can be haunted? Like, there's ghosts, but then there's also... being haunted by the guy/girl you're crushing on. What about being haunted by the future?

These are some of the initial reasons you might consider reading Andrew Taylor's The Anatomy of Ghosts.

Released January, 2011, this book is a great read to start off the new year.

It's not an amazing read. But it's easy to read without being mindless. It's fun, and intriguing, and filled with a cast of interesting characters. It has lots of inappropriate behavior. It even has a secret society.

Like Dan Brown, but, you know, good.

And the protagonist not insanely obsessed with not ruining his pair of loafers.

The protagonist is, instead, the financially handicapped John Holdsworth. After his son and wife tragically drown, Holdsworth finds that his business soon suffers, as well. Having little money, living in his former house with a friend and that friend's wife (the latter of whom makes it clear she doesn't want him in her new house), Holdsworth is kind of losing at life.

Then, a condescending rich old lady who wears too much white powder on her face says that since he's a bookseller, she will hire him to evaluate and distribute her library - if he also agrees to save her son, who is in an asylum b/c he thinks he's seen a ghost.

Her son, like many college boys, has been drinking, gambling, and copulating. Very shortly before he went insane, he joined one of those secret societies, & it was... so wrong.

Andrew Taylor specializes in historical fiction, and The Anatomy of Ghosts is no exception. This novel takes place in the late eighteenth century.

Overall, it's a mystery story. What happened on the night that Frank, rich powdery-white bitch's possibly insane son, was inducted into the secret society? On that same night, two women died. Were they killed? If so, who killed them? Why does Frank think he saw a ghost?

Or is it possible that he actually did see one?

(I know, but I'm not going to tell you. You'll have to read the book to find out.)

What You MEAN to Say vs. What You ACTUALLY Say

2010-12-13T12:41:00.000-08:00

Like most young Americans these days, I have an at least mild case of ADD, which makes me an epic channel flipper (& completely annoying to people who actually want to watch a show in its' entirety). As such, I don't watch a lot of commercials.

And then I watched a commercial the other day, and got a writing lesson, so I guess they're good for something other than making us want things we don't need except in a meaningless attempt to fill the gaping black hole created by American marketing that continually demands more THINGS. It was the family photo "cloud" commercial:

There is... so much wrong with this commercial. Yet the thing that irks me most about it is when the mother says: "Windows gives me the family nature never could."

Wait... WHAT?!

Seriously - who releases something like this around the holidays? Who greenlighted this commercial? Who WROTE THAT LINE?

It's horrible. It's Lois Griffin horrible.

To begin with, that woman has no place to criticize anyone when she's making her family wear those horrible matching plaid shirts. *shudder*

Second, as I've already mentioned, young America is known (and always has been) for the "fidget factor." We're impatient, and the "get it now" imperative that culture has been shoving down people's throats is only making it worse. So how can you reasonably expect your kids to remain perfectly positioned for numerous photos if you don't tranquilize them first?

Obviously, someone's parenting skills are nonexistent.

Now, I know that the holidays are hectic & crazy and that people get overwhelmed sometimes. But there's no sense of that in this commercial. Her family continues to sit on the couch while she tells them they're not good enough.

I'm going to assume that this impression is not what Windows meant to get across.

Because while the holidays are hectic & crazy, that's one of the things that makes them so fun & wonderful. You put effort into them to show the people you care about how much they mean to you - not so you can force them to wear hideous clothing & make them feel bad about themselves.

So while you're writing, keep in mind what your words are ACTUALLY saying.

A Memoir About Loss

2010-12-06T16:00:00.000-08:00

Let me preface this book review by saying that I don't ordinarily read very much non-fiction anymore & that I had never read a Joyce Carol Oates book before. I was curious, and I wanted to experience how the well-known Oates writes. So I requested, and was lucky enough to receive, her memoir A Widow's Story, which will be released March 2011.

My feelings towards this book are ambivalent.

I can see a lot of great things in it and about it, but I didn't really enjoy reading it.

The memoir details what the author went through and experienced just before, during and after her husband died.

The first thing I would say about this memoir, is that you immediately notice that Oates writes well, and is very intelligent.

It's clear that Oates is a literary person, both due to the way that she writes, as well as the references that she makes. She quotes and alludes to people and concepts that make it obviuos Oates has spent a lot of time in the world of academia. It's a little intimidating, but it also makes you feel good about your own seeming intelligence - the way she so blithely discusses the people/concepts/etc., it somehow seems implied that she thinks you will know who/what she is talking about - particularly when you actually do know who/what she's referencing.

The second thing I would say about this memoir - far too much use of stream-of-consciousness (for my tastes).

I can understand the use for stream-of-consciousness writing/rambling. Really. I have read it in great works of literature; I have used it myself, both in personal essays, and works of fiction. I understand that sometimes, a writer has to use it.

I can also understand why Oates uses it so consistently in her memoir. Suddenly, her brain is moving a mile a minute, repetitively - she's not thinking in complete sentences. Often, her brain may not even be coherently registering a complete thought, let alone think in complete sentences. It's all fragments and confusion - and stream-of-consciousness perfectly portrays that.

Just as it is difficult to live in a state where you're constantly overwhelmed with thoughts that are vague, unclear, and half-stated, however, it is also difficult for me to READ something that is written in such a manner, if it occurs for more than a few paragraphs. Oates used it a lot in the galley which I received, and after a few chapters utilizing it, my attention span began to wane. Dramatically.

The memoir also necessarily repeats - usually stated in slightly different ways, after awhile, it was glaringly obvious that Oates was repeating the same material. This means, of course, that she was also GOING THROUGH the same things numerous times - which is a true-to-life sentiment. It also means, however, that much of the memoir, if you're not interested in reading repetition, feels unnecessary.

The concept of the memoir is interesting, and I feel that if you like non-fiction, this book is probably something that you should check out. If you're generally a strict fiction fan, however, avoid this book, as it will probably not hold your interest for very long.

I will finish by talking about my least favorite aspect of this book - the omniscient writing.

Oates wrote a lot of passages that began with something along the lines of: "To the widow...," "The widow feels...," "The widow thinks..."

I guess this was so that widows reading the novel will feel like they're not alone.

To me, however, it felt pompous.

I mean, isn't every widowing experience going to be different? I felt like some of the things Oates claims "the widow" goes through were a bit specific.

Her book is entitled A Widow's Story - meaning, what SHE, specifically went through. As she's only one widow, it just didn't sit well with me, that she decided to be the spokesperson for all widows.

For those who have read Oates' work before - is her fiction different from her non-fiction? If I didn't like this memoir, is it unlikely that I will like any of her work, or was my dislike probably with regards to this book in particular? (I have a BURNING DESIRE to know the answer - it is as if my pants are on fire, and your answer is the bucket of water, poised to put that fire out - so please, be my fireman/firewoman, and toss some water/answers on me!)

A Widow's Story goes on sale March, 2011.

Fated

2010-11-24T12:00:00.000-08:00

I recently devoured a book entitled Fated, written by S.G. Browne. And all I can say is "Wow."

Here is the cover:

Okay. Now that you know what to look for, go to your nearest bookstore, grab a copy off the shelf, and start reading. It's really that good.

...

For those of you unwilling to blindly rush to the bookstore and make a purchase based on the advice of a person you've never met, I guess I'll tell you a little bit more about Browne's book.

The book is narrated by Fate. Fate, you see, that abstract concept, is dealt out by an angel named Fate, who also goes by the name Fabio. Fate is buddies with Karma, gets help from Honesty, and is Enemies-with-Benefits with Destiny, amongst many other colorful, wonderful characters.

This book that is narrated by an angel, shows what humanity seems like to someone who's not human, but who has known a lot of them. There is a lot of "WTF are you thinking" as well as understanding and compassion, and all of it is funny at the same time.

This book made me laugh - a lot - actually out loud - and yet, it still had heart. It was relatable, while still being new and different and fun.

There was one thing I wasn't particularly a fan of - the ending. The very ending, as in the last chapter, there was a twist. I don't want to give it away, but I wasn't a fan of it. Despite not liking the very end, however, I still highly recommend reading this book.

It is books like Fated, you see, that make voracious readers.

My Mother is Hilarious

2010-11-22T13:08:00.000-08:00

You know those times when you're texting someone, and you start spouting/typing nonsense b/c you don't want to seem boring? (Or is that just me?)

Well, regardless of whether it's a universal reaction or not, my mother totally gets it, as evidenced by this texting exchange that occurred the other day:

MomBot2010: How's it going Toots?

Me: Fine. How are you?

MomBot2010: Fine, thank you. I love you.

Me: Uhn uh. *shakes head*

MomBot2010: don't be crazy

Me: Yes. *nods vigorously*

MomBot2010: you crack me up. I miss hanging out with you.

Me: Me too. Miss hanging with you, I mean. (I hang w/ myself all the time... It's a li'l scary. I won't leave myself alone. Am I a STALKER?!) [inserted emoticon w/ shifting, paranoid eyes]

MomBot2010: you are one of a kind. I am so proud that you are my daughter.

And that is why I love my mom - no one else would respond with kind, comforting words to my craziness.

Also, in case anyone was wondering, my mom isn't a robot & doesn't use the pseudonym given to her on this blog entry. Although, if she was a robot, that might be kind of cool. Except spankings would have hurt like a bitch growing up. One more reason to be glad my mom is the way she is.

NaNo Update

2010-11-20T03:45:00.001-08:00

So now that pretty much everyone who has been writing every day is faring better than me - here's a quick update.

I am currently sitting at 5,858 words.

I got very, excruciatingly sick the second day of NaNo. I'm a big wimp when it comes to illness, and once I began vomiting, I knew I was in trouble. I have the stomach of an ox, if oxen have very strong stomachs. So in between making sure to get plenty of fluids and plenty of sleep, because my body has suddenly decided to get tired at the drop of a hat, it's been kind of hard to get writing in.

Plus, I was really hating what I was writing, though I love my idea, so I started over about a week in.

I'm trying to keep writing every day, but with the more important goal of getting healthy again (I'm still not 100%, or even 85%, unfortunately), I just don't think it's going to happen this November. I'm aiming to finish the first draft by the end of December.

I hope everyone else's NaNovel is going well, and sorry I've been mostly M.I.A. lately.

Any updates? Let me know how your current writing project (NaNo or not) is going!

"you were wrong" is oh so right

2010-10-30T09:00:00.000-07:00

Today, I'm going to be reviewing you were wrong by Matthew Sharpe.

Matthew Sharpe's novel [you were wrong] is something I highly recommend.

A detective story of the oddest kind, where the mystery trying to be solved is life itself, which is sometimes too large, cruel, and ever-changing to seem anything but confusing. The book is narrated by a guy named Karl, who has been apathetic and coasting through life, until an event near the beginning of the novel causes him to realize what he's been missing... sort of.

Because Karl hasn't been participating in society for the entirety of his adult life, he doesn't really understand the subterfuge that people participate in on a daily basis. He's not an idiot, he's just innocent. Rather than interacting with other people his age, Karl has mostly been interacting with the high school students to whom he teaches math. Karl is actually somewhat of a math genius, and tends to try to understand the world in mathematical terms. This trait he has is endearing - Karl's sense of logic is impeccable, whereas his grasp of emotions is clumsy and incomplete. His innocence makes his fumbling with the situation unfolding throughout the novel confusing and large and interesting, like the adult world seen through the eyes of an extremely precocious child.

Released at the end of August this year, you can pick up a copy at amazon, find an independent bookstore to purchase it from at indiebound, or, of course, pick up a copy at your local Borders or Barnes & Noble.

NaNo 2010

2010-10-13T07:09:00.000-07:00

November is once more near, and with it comes the challenge to write a first novel draft of at least 50,000 words.

If you're accepting the challenge, as well, make sure to let me know your username, so we can spur each other on to the final word count. :)

The other day on Twitter, I said I was "outlining" my NaNovel. This was somewhat of a lie, as I suck at outlining, and ended up with just a bit of brainstorming.

My idea this year is to write a story about and entitled "Road Rage."

My narrator will be a young, rich female (currently unnamed) who lives primarily in the Midwest b/c her parents think this is a better place to raise kids. I say primarily, because in the summers, her family vacations in a mansion on their own private island off of the Southern California coast.

With all of that money, she doesn't necessarily have an accurate conception of life and how it works.

I think I'm going to open the novel on an incident in which the female narrator wrecks her car in - you guessed it - an incident of road rage. Her parents fight over the number of accidents she has been in and whether she deserves a new car. (Dad is for; mom is against)

As a result of their argument, the narrator is introduced to Pierre, a guy a few years older than she, who uses a phony French accent around her parents and smokes copiously when they aren't around.

And then...

So what do you think? Do you like the idea? Dislike it? Have any ideas as to names for any of the characters, save Pierre? Do you think first person narrative is a good idea? Or would 3rd person work better?

Let's Talk About the Kids

2010-10-11T15:25:00.000-07:00

So... I have been crazy busy. I've still found time to read, because that's one of my relaxations & escapes, but I have been getting behind on reviews. So today you get a 2 for 1 deal! That's right - I'm going to review TWO books in ONE blog entry! Do you feel special? Because you are.

The two books I'm going to write about today are:

Museum of Thieves

and Radiance

Both of these books have been written for a middle-school aged audience. Both books felt appropriate for that age group.

I will look at Lian Tanner's Museum of Thieves first.

Tanner's book is a fantasy. It primarily follows the activities of Goldie, a young girl who is always getting in trouble in the over-protective society she lives in. The adults in the community, frightened by all of the horrible things that can't really be explained but just exist (i.e., plague, children dying, etc.), have allowed their freedoms to be quashed in order to be protected.

This book did a really good job of pointing out that kids need to be kids. That it's good for them to have enough freedom to find strength and have fun. That it's bad for them to feel like their life is in peril at every turn. For while bad things do occasionally happen, the good things don't often happen, either, if you only focus on protecting yourself.

I liked the characters in this book. I liked the world that Tanner created. I liked the messages, and I had fun reading this book.

Now, on to Radiance, written by Alyson Noel. You've probably heard of Noel's Evermore. It's the first in a series of books, none of which I have read, but which have sold well.

Radiance was my first Noel novel, and it was okay. I think it would mean more to the teens who have read Evermore and are avid fans of that series, as Radiance follows the adventures of Ever's younger sister Riley after the car crash that left Ever pretty much all alone in the world.

Riley is understandably upset that her life has been cut short because she wasted the time spent on Earth hounding her sister, and now she will never have boobs. That's kind of this book in a nutshell.

Riley is learning how to be dead, which is remarkably like being alive, except that you can materialize shit and have whatever kind of awesome wardrobe you want. Really, I found this book somewhat depressing.

"Don't worry about your life getting cut short. You still get to go to SCHOOL in heaven! & you get assigned a JOB! It's pretty much all of the soul-sucking shit people hate on Earth, but it's NEVER-ENDING because you're dead now!"

Yay?

Anyway, Riley was probably a realistic tween, which means that she got on my nerves. She was impulsive, disrespectful, and somehow, amazingly good at everything, anyway.

I don't really recommend Radiance unless you're a big fan of the Evermore Immortals series and want to round out your collection. It's okay, but I much preferred reading Museum of Thieves.

Both of these books are now on sale. Have you read them? What are your thoughts?

What is Family?

2010-08-29T16:59:00.000-07:00

If you asked a five-year-old this question, the child would have no problem answering it - family is the people who live with you at home, the people you're related to, the people who love you. The words would roll glibly off the child's tongue, and the child could return to its' play. As you grow older, however, the answer seems to grow increasingly complex, and the words don't always come as easily as they did when you were five.

"What is family?" seems to be the question asked repeatedly in Jennifer Vanderbes' novel Strangers at the Feast.

Strangers at the Feast is the story of a family gathering on Thanksgiving, 2007. It is told through the voices of many of the family members, as well as a black boy named Kijo is breaking into a house that Thanksgiving. The voices are interlocked, and the perspective changes frequently -- it could be dizzying, and hard to handle, but instead, it works together beautifully.

This book makes you ask yourself: "What is family?" It also causes you to wonder: "What if?" With all of the different opportunities to make choices in your life, how can you be sure you've made the right choice? And does it matter if your choice was the correct one or not?

I opened my blog post with the idea that to a child, the answers to questions that can really make us think as adults sometimes seem ridiculously easy to answer. I find it interesting that the only child's perspectives we receive in the book are flashbacks from characters who are now adult - and there aren't many where the adults are thinking back on a time when they were truly children.

I adored this book. It is written clearly, elegantly. It is interesting, it contains detail, it makes the reader think. Overall, this book is one that I highly recommend to anyone who is looking for good writing, as well as enjoyment.

One of my favorite qualities of this book is that it makes you think about very difficult issues, provides many perspectives on those issues, but doesn't really give a definitive view as to what perspective is the correct one.

Have you read this book? Did you like it? Why or why not?

Guilty Pleasures

2010-08-26T06:28:00.000-07:00

While some people secretly indulge in masturbation (in the living room with their friend sleeping next to them on the couch: http://tinyurl.com/24znbnl) or more dangerous activities such as self-inflicted harm, I am referring to the comparatively tamer pleasure of enjoying a book that's not very well-written.

We all have a few, right?

As a former fan of the Sweet Valley High and Fearless series(es), I probably shouldn't ever poke fun at what others read (but, of course, still do. Frequently).

For a long time, Stephen King was a guilty pleasure for me. I have recently come to terms with my love for the King, even writing a few blog posts about what an idiot I was previously. The best thing about guilty pleasures, however, is the ways that our mind attempts to find reasons that it's totally okay for us to like these things we think, for whatever reason, we shouldn't like.

If you're a more sophisticated person than me, you probably shrug, say: "It's not very good, but I like it," & continue to indulge yourself.

If you're of a more crazy variety (possibly like me, though I don't think I'd admit to it), you probably come up with "theories" explaining your liking for your guilty pleasure.

All of this babble is an attempt for me to explain my theory as to why Stephen King is the modern-day Shakespeare.

It sounds pompous, I know.

The Bard:

Stephen King:

It might be a little pompous. But I haven't had anyone shoot it down, yet, so my theory still flies around in my brain. (So if you're going to shoot it down, be gentle, lest you cause my brain to hemhorrage.)

My theory mostly has to do with quantity. I am amazed at the sheer amount of work that these two men have managed to create (for King, thus far) in their lifetimes.

Both Shakespeare and King are fairly literary. They were/are smart men who were/are well-read. (From henceforth, I'm going to refer to both Shakespeare's & King's qualities, attributes, & accomplishments in present tense.) They know how to make allusions, and to what they should allude.

Shakespeare and Stephen King also both write about the world in which they live. When you read The Dead Zone, you're reminded that things like speed limits on the highway, and a drinking age of 21 are relatively recent additions to United States law. You can imagine, 200 years from now, people reading King's books in history class, both because it was popular literature, and because it describes the time period we live in very well.

I think Shakespeare and Stephen King are good writers, but not amazing ones. My reasoning for this is probably entirely superficial - it's too easy to understand their work. Maybe I don't get all of the allusions made, but I also don't feel like I have to read a sentence twice to comprehend the meaning, or even just take in its' beauty again. Personally, I have never had trouble exchanging "thee" for "you" in my head, and so Shakespeare has never really seemed like a huge deal to me. I read a book like Nabakov's Lolita and think to myself: "Wow. That was amazing. I will have to read that book again." I read Shakespeare's Romeo & Juliet and think to myself: "Wow. Those two were so STUPID. Just like my 18-year-old sister with her boyfriend-of-the-month." Both works have good writing, both works made me feel something, but Shakespeare and King don't make me think as much as I think a literary work needs to in order for me to hail it as something that NEEDS to withstand the test of time. There are the works I WANT my future children and other people's children to go on reading because they open your mind to new possibilities. And there are works like Shakespeare and King that I know my future children and other people's children will read because you can't go into a bookstore without seeing works by those authors, and so they will have some sort of opinion on the authors, just as I do.

With the amount of words that King has had published, I think the likelihood of his work surviving is high, just as Shakespeare's words have thus far survived -- and this is why, in my mind, King is the modern-day Shakespeare.

What is one of your guilty pleasures and/or conspiracy theories? I would love to read it/them in the comments below...

Who the hell cares about vampires anymore? Give me werewolves...

2010-08-15T10:00:00.000-07:00

Today, I am going to be looking at a young adult book entitled Nightshade. I was lucky enough to receive an advance uncorrected galley, but the book itself will be released in October of this year, 2010.*

Nightshade was written by Andrea Cremer, a history professor who lives in Minneapolis, home of the Mall of America.**

To summarize, Nightshade is the story of Calla, a "guardian"*** who is very beautiful, has a pack of friends (also werewolves) over whom she presides, has been engaged to a very hot, very popular boy named Ren her entire life, and is fine with her life of glorified slavery until...

...she meets another cute boy named Shay.

I loved this book. I honestly wasn't expecting to like it very much, but I read it in its' entirety in two days.****

Andrea Cremer did a wonderful job of writing teenagers who are teenagers, rather than precocious pseudo-adults or annoying twats who learn all of their SAT vocabulary from bloated novels about sparkling vampires. Her teenagers seem like teenagers who are still interesting to those of us who aren't teenagers anymore.

At the same time, Mrs. Cremer writes about so much more than a group of teenagers and how they interact, entertaining as such subject matter is on its' own merit. In her writing, and the pact society she has created, Mrs. Cremer writes about feminism, and the importance of freedom as opposed to the easiness of tradition.

The complexity of this novel, paired with the wonderful characters whom the reader comes to know and care deeply about, make Nightshade a must-read.

So make sure you read it.

*Unlike L.J. Smith's Strange Fate, which I am STILL waiting on. I'm beginning to think her publishers just hate me.

**This is probably weird, but that is seriously the only thing I ever remember about Minneapolis, Minnesota.

***werewolf

****which, considering that it was in the middle of the work week, is quicker than it sounds

First Impressions: Jodi Picoult

2010-08-04T09:01:00.000-07:00

So because I occasionally read another blog with an awesome name, I decided to try reading a Jodi Picoult book.

I had never read her work before because, quite frankly, I had seen a Lifetime movie based on one of her books called "The Pact," and it was really, really horrible, despite having the funny chick from Will & Grace, and I didn't think that the woman who wrote the book that inspired it was my style.

BUT, I trust Possum, who recommended her work to me.

To be fair, it was not as horrible as I expected. At the same time, I did not consider her work to be genius, nor particularly probing.

Jodi Picoult is lauded as a writer who makes her readers really think about difficult issues. So I guess I was expecting something new while I was reading Salem Falls.

In a nutshell, Salem Falls deals with the topics of rape and witchcraft.

I wouldn't say that Picoult dealt with it in a horrible manner. I thought she was sensitive, and I thought that she did a pretty good job of showing multiple facets of rape.

I also, however, thought her book was fairly predictable. The very end of the novel feels like it's supposed to be a twist, something the reader didn't see on a first reading. Well, I saw it, and I saw it within the first third of the novel, which is relatively early.

I did like that the ending wasn't quite so black and white. I was kind of expecting that all of the bad guys were going to be outed, and that the good guy (there was really only one) was going to be exonerated, and if the book had ended that way, I would be decrying it as a piece of unrealistic tripe.

Overall, I can see why Picoult is a bestselling author. Really, I can. It's because she writes like a romance writer, but one who can pretend her books aren't just about love and happy endings and sex. The core of her novels, however, is that love is redeeming. That it "lifts us up where we belong" as some idealist once sang. It's a nice message. Picoult doesn't present it in a very interesting way, however. She presents it in a predictable way.

Infinite Days of Mediocrity

2010-07-29T09:21:00.000-07:00

Today I am going to be reviewing Infinite Days, by Rebecca Maizel.

So basically, the premise of the novel is how would someone who was made into a bloodsucking monster during the Middle Ages respond to suddenly being a human, teenage girl again during nowadays*?

This is a very interesting idea, and worthy of exploring. In fact, I liked many of the ideas in Maizel's novel.

The writing, however, was not of superb caliber. Occasionally, I got glimpses of beautiful writing from Maizel, but they were few & fleeting.

I thought the characters were fairly flat and uninteresting. Occasionally, they said something funny, but reading the novel, I could tell that Maizel thought she was being funny far more often than I did.

This book is okay. No masterpiece. I slogged** through it. I felt like the ending was preposterous. I didn't particularly care about the main character, though it is her story line that drives the novel.

My verdict: very interesting ideas & very poor execution.

*And in case anyone else is wondering, it's a word: http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/nowadays

**Yep. This one too: http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/slog

The King, Part II

2010-06-27T08:37:00.000-07:00

I previously wrote about my first experience reading Stephen King, which was horrible. Cujo was not frightening, in the least. As a result, I became condescending towards those I caught reading his work.

My first experience reading Stephen King occurred the summer between fifth and sixth grade. Once I had read my first Stephen King, the snowball effect occurred. At garage sales, when I spotted a Stephen King book, I asked my mother if I could read it, more to push the envelope than out of interest for reading his work. Despite my predisposition for becoming frightened, my mother became increasingly lenient, and tended to say "yes."

So even though I didn't think highly of King's writing, it was available to me, and at times, was the only material available to me.

Thus, a combination of boredom and ready availability resulted in my reading more Stephen King books, such as:

Christine, a book about a car that possesses and destroys people.

Thinner, a tale about this asshole who pisses off a gypsy and is cursed to waste away:

Then, one winter when I was in high school, my entire family got sick -- except for my father, who hardly ever becomes ill. One by one, my siblings and mother became ill and ran for the bathroom so that they could retch into the toilet. (Coincidentally, this was the last year that my family ordered a ham for the annual Christmas dinner.)

I went to bed still feeling relatively healthy. I awoke from my slumber in the middle of the night, made my first of several trips into the bathroom, and spent the majority of the evening attempting, and failing, to find a comfortable resting position.

Whilst huddled miserably in my bed, I read one of Stephen King's great novels: Misery. His novel about a writer who is trapped with his "Number One Fan."

I adored this book - reading it is my happiest memory of that particular Christmas, despite the fact that my stomach and head ached.

Misery convinced me that Stephen King occasionally wrote well... I could understand why some people read Stephen King. Occasionally, at least, works that were very enjoyable were created by The King.

I wasn't as much of a snob, anymore.

Preview: My next post about Stephen King will also discuss Shakespeare...

On Material Belongings

2010-06-26T11:03:00.000-07:00

I recently read a tiny book entitled Proust's Overcoat, originally written by Lorenza Foschini, translated by Eric Karpeles --

This slim volume recounts the obsessive need of collector Jacques Guerin to possess the former belongings of Marcel Proust. Letters, first editions, furniture... anything that was once important to, or written by Proust, Guerin wants to see, touch, and experience.

Basically, Guerin was rich, having inherited a perfume company his mother made great, and he thought Proust was a genius. Guerin also met Marcel's brother, having become ill, and luckily having physician Robert Proust visit his house to check on his health.

This contact with Robert Proust, and seeing a draft of Marcel's work, inspired a passion in Guerin to see all of Marcel's things.

The overcoat, being one of Marcel Proust's trademarks, basically something Marcel LIVED in, even in warm weather, is the coup de grace.

This book is an interesting look at what the material things left behind say about the person who used to own them, and the importance of those belongings to the people who cared about you.

It was interesting, it was informative, and it read very quickly.

I think this book would be great for Proust admirers, or as a quirky gift to someone else. It will be released in August of this year.

I Don't Usually Blog About Myself

2010-06-21T19:32:00.000-07:00

But I can't keep quiet.

My boyfriend asked me to marry him -- and I said yes.

No date or plans made yet, just excitement. Lots & lots of good feelings & excitement.

Book Review: Mr. Toppit

2010-06-14T07:20:00.000-07:00

A few days ago I finished reading Mr. Toppit, the debut novel by Charles Elton.

This novel has already been released, and done very well, in England, and is slated to be released in the U.S. in September of this year.

Mr. Toppit is the story of a children's book series, written by a man named Arthur Hayman. The protagonist of the series is based on Arthur's son Luke, and after Arthur's death, and an American woman's influence, the books become bestsellers. The remaining Haymans - Luke, his mother Martha, and his sister Rachel, then have to deal with the sudden fame. The allusion to the Winnie the Pooh franchise is noticeable, although Arthur's series is supposed to be a quite a bit darker. The title of the novel comes from the overbearing, unseen antihero of the novels, who consistently gives Luke tasks that cannot be fulfilled to Mr. Toppit's satisfaction.

Overall, when I finished the book, I did not feel like it was one of the most amazing books ever written. I did feel, however, that it was entertaining, that it wasn't predictable, and that it was addicting. I wanted to keep reading. I wanted to know what crazy things were going to be said and done next. I sympathized with Luke, and I was not expecting the fitting ending. I kept reading because I wanted to keep reading, not because I felt like I had to in order to write an adequate review.

Mr. Toppit is a dark novel, in which the characters act like real people. Some of the things they do don't make sense, and those that do make sense are often slightly horrifying.

It is an entertaining read, and I recommend it. I think it is interesting, slightly depressing, and the characters stay with you, both while you're reading the novel and afterwards.

The King

2010-06-05T08:10:00.000-07:00

My first experience with The King occurred the summer after fifth grade. I had begged and begged my mother to allow me to read Stephen King novels throughout fifth grade, my reasoning being that Kit Macaroon * was allowed to read Stephen King, & I was much smarter than she**.

My mother always steadfastly refused - her reasoning being that Stephen King wrote horror stories, and that I am easily frightened. She liked to cite the movie "The Witches," which is based on a Roald Dahl book, which is meant to be a comedy, but gave me nightmares for years. (I also might, possibly, have received nightmares from the movie "How the Grinch Stole Christmas.")

So okay, I was easily frightened at the tender ages of four and six, but I argued that I was more mature, at the age of eleven.***

My mother didn't believe me.

Then finally, the summer after fifth grade, as the family wandered around in some stranger's garage perusing their old belongings to see if we wanted to buy anything, I found a bright orange, hardcover copy of a book entitled Cujo, with that yearned for name, "Stephen King," printed in bold letters on the spine.

25 cents

How could mom say no?

I ran to her, excitement radiating from my being, and showed her the book, begging to please, please, please be allowed to read it.

After thinking for a moment, my mother said "okay." This book, she said, was not too scary. She would let me read it.

I began reading the book on a hot, bright summer day, sprawling out on the grass beside our driveway.

And I was disappointed.

At this period of my life, I was under the impression that any prolific author must, by definition, be amazing. After all of the build-up to how frightening Stephen King was, reading a book about a rabid dog was a let-down. I also wasn't frightened.

Due to this experience, I went through a period of quite a few years where I decided that The King wasn't really that great a writer. I looked down on those who found his writing addicting, who owned more than a few of his books.

That one bad experience colored my view of the author for years. Have YOU ever had an experience like that?

*The name has been changed to protect privacy.

**I realize this is pompous reasoning, but it really was exactly what I said to my mom.

***This, of course, was a complete lie, whether I realized it or not.

Okay, this Book Really IS at least Partly about Sex

2010-05-30T20:31:00.000-07:00

Today, I am reviewing Permanent Obscurity, by Richard Perez. He has a really cool website set up that details his inspiration for the book, and some of the ideas behind it. His book is concerned with some graphic subject matter - chiefly, drugs, sex and massive alcohol consumption. My feelings toward this book are somewhat divided.

I will begin with the cursing. The book primarily takes place in some not-very-nice parts of New York city. It makes sense, then, that the characters swear profusely and have a crude sense of humor. Initially, however, I was having trouble with the book because of the manner of speaking. I don't expect perfect English in novels - people don't talk that way, so neither should fictional characters. I understood WHY the characters talked the way that they did - still, it put distance between me as a reader and the characters, and made the characters less sympathetic.

On a related note, at times, when characters were joking, I wouldn't have known if the author had not specified it. The author may have been doing this on purpose, in an attempt to show that the characters are so inebriated that the things they find humorous aren't really funny. Again, it created emotional distance between myself and the characters.

Now, I will talk about the characters. Obviously, most of them do drugs and drink profusely. Most of them also consider themselves artists, and a big theme in the book regards art. There are the artists who ignore their calling in favor of a regular, 9-5 job so that they can afford to pay rent and buy food. There are the artists who have crappy, low-paying jobs so that they can continue to create art, but who usually favor getting wasted instead. Then, there's Serena. Serena is the protagonist's "best friend." She is a performance artist, but her band's not doing that well. As a result, she picks up some kinky modeling work. She also seems to live off of her male friend, whom she dominates, and whom she doesn't particularly seem to care about.

Serena seems to be one of those charismatic people who gets away with a lot of bullshit for a really long time because those who are close to her are hypnotized by her charm. Her life has been hard, and she has rather sociopathic tendencies, as a result.

Most of the art created by the characters in this book is pornographic in nature. Throughout the book, the idea of the protagonist and Serena creating a fetish pornography film is discussed, planned, and ultimately, carried out. The idea of the slippery slope with regards to modeling, stripping, etc. is introduced and/or implied several times.

The book is reminiscent of Hunter S. Thompson, both with regards to subject matter, and in terms of an unreliable narrator. Ultimately, the book ends with several serious questions.

I will say that the last 100 pages or so flew by. Pairing that with the admittedly slow-going beginning, I would say that overall, the book is okay.

I feel that the author probably accomplished what he was aiming for. The book just wasn't as interesting as I thought I would find it. It did raise some questions that I like thinking about. Then again, I wasn't particularly fond of the narrative tone. Overall, I found this book okay. I'm not sorry that I read it, but I don't know that I would read it, again.

To the right person, however, this book would be amazing.

The Beautiful Cover Lies

2010-05-24T19:49:00.000-07:00

I recently received an advance uncorrected proof of Jenna Black's Glimmerglass. Here's a picture of the cover, which is gorgeous:

Glimmerglass is the first book in a young adult fantasy series. Chronicling the adventures of a teenage girl named Dana, this book follows her from whining about her alcoholic mother to whining about being in Avalon to whining about her father to whining about missing her alcoholic mother to whining about more stuff.

As you might be able to tell, I was not a big fan of this book. The plot was okay -- the plot actually dealt with some pretty interesting ideas. What I came across was something I come across a lot in fantasy: I didn't care about the characters. I've written before about the importance of caring about a character, for me. In the case of this book, I do not feel that the characters take a background to the story and the world-building, however.

I feel like most of the writing is simply not as sympathetic as the author wants it to be.

Having an alcoholic mother and constantly being on the move is hard. Not knowing a parent is hard. Running away is a stupid action that usually doesn't turn out the way a teenager thinks it will.

But I just felt like Dana was whining.

I feel like the writing needs to be refined, like this book should have been further revised.

Then again, I wasn't a huge fan of Twilight, either, and that's a bestselling series. And Twilight has a teenage protagonist who is insecure and annoying and boring, but people love it. And Twilight is a fantasy novel with an interesting plot that could stand to be revised. I do think Twilight is slightly better written. The Glimmerglass plot moves along quickly, but it's not effective due to the way it was written - it feels hurried. There's a lot that happens, but it all feels too fast.

The cover's awesome, but I recommend a pass on buying this book. I think Jenna Black is going to refine her writing. This book has a lot of good elements, but it's not all put together well yet.

The Title Alludes to SEX (Kind of, sort of, maybe)

2010-05-15T06:56:00.000-07:00

The Book: The Lovers

The Author: Vendela Vida

The Cover (at least, of my uncorrected proof):

The link (to the publisher page w/ information about the book and pre-ordering)

The thoughts:

The Lovers is the tale of a woman named Yvonne and her trip to Turkey.

Yvonne is alone. Literally, she has no traveling companion. On a related note, as the novel progresses, her relationships with family, friends & acquaintances are examined, as well as the idea of relationships, in general.

While in Turkey, Yvonne befriends a young boy who sells shells on the beach (thus the picture on the cover of the book). This friendship is at one point compared to two people in a romantic relationship - an observation by a character in the book, not by the narrator. This passing remark sticks with the reader, both because of the book's title and the fact that numerous romantic relationships in the book have been mentioned. Yvonne and her young friend, while in no way romantically involved, get along in a way that none of the romantic relationships in the book do, but in a way that many romantic relationships are portrayed in the media.

I adored this book. The writing was concise - Vida utilizes her words beautifully. She writes simply about complicated manners, and the result is a poignant novel that stays with you after you've finished the last word. I love that this book makes the reader think and that it's well written - and I think you'll love that about this book, too.

The Release Date: July, 2010

Stephenie Meyer Spells Her Name Wrong AND Rips Off Popular Stories

2010-05-01T21:11:00.000-07:00

Though I watched the first season of True Blood almost a year ago, I didn't get around to reading Charlaine Harris' Dead Until Dark until this week. For those who have been woefully ignorant thus far that True Blood has a literary predecessor, the popular television show is based on the popular "Sookie Stackhouse" book series.

(On a random side note, I like this cover so much better than the original cover art.)

The series is told from the point of view of a telepathic waitress named Sookie Stackhouse, and the strange way things unfold when a vampire openly moves into the small Southern town where she lives.

Yet the reason I'm blogging about it is because it felt really, really familiar. Not just because I had already seen the first season of the television show. It felt familiar because I had already read Stephenie (seriously, what's with the spelling?) Meyer's Twilight.

Both novels have a primary character who can read minds. Both novels have vampire characters who gleam. Both novels have, as protagonist, a beautiful young girl. In both novels, the beautiful female protagonist has two supernatural suitors, one of whom is a vampire, the other of whom is a shapeshifter.

I know I've touched on this issue previously, but those are a lot of similarities between two bestselling book series. You've got to wonder if Stephenie Meyer's "dream" coincided with reading a certain book by Charlaine Harris.

Having read both books, I prefer Dead Until Dark. It's got all of the fun, addicting romantic stuff that's in Twilight (in a more realistic fashion, thank God), but has sex and violence aplenty. I've heard creepy stuff about sex being in the young adult series further down the road. Harris' series is more mature from the beginning.

I wouldn't say that Dead Until Dark is amazing, or a must-read. It's entertaining. It's got its' pros and cons.

I would say that it's disappointing that one of the biggest "pros" in Stephenie Meyer's favor - creativity - has proven to be nothing more than a dilution of the already popular ideas of a better writer.

And reading Dead Until Dark brought a question to the forefront of my mind: when does the number of similarities between two works of art become too great for the differences to matter?

Review: Juliet

2010-04-23T12:24:00.000-07:00

I recently received an ARC of Anne Fortier's Juliet, which is going on sale August 17, 2010. Here's a link to pre-order the book. Update: image of the cover -

My feelings towards this book are ambivalent.

As you might have guessed, the title alludes to the female half of those famous star-crossed lovers Shakespeare wrote about. When the aunt who raised her (and her twin sister) dies, Julie Jacobs returns to the house. She is upset that she didn't utilize the time she had left to say goodbye to her aunt, and becomes further upset when she discovers she was written out of her aunt's will (or was she? An interesting discovery springs up later).

The servant who was like a father to her growing up gives her a letter her aunt left to her, which essentially says her aunt has been lying to her all of these years by changing her name to Julie Jacobs. Her real name is Guilietta Tolomei. Her aunt's letter also claims that her mother was searching for a treasure in Siena, Italy, and that this treasure was meant for Guilietta, and not her sister, which is why the house was left to the sister. The sibling rivalry in the beginning is thick enough to eat with a spoon.

Julie is surprised, as partisan gifts are rather out of character for her aunt, but hops on a plane to Siena with the passport her aunt left her. She is deeply in debt, having always relied on the idea that her aunt was going to give her money, and is grieved to discover that now she will have to find her own way to climb up the mountain of debt she has accrued.

It gets worse when she discovers that this "treasure" her mother searched for was really more of a genealogical thing. Her mother found documents that indicate that she is related to Guilietta Tolomei, the girl whose love with a boy named Romeo Marescotti inspired several dramas about their doomed love, one of which was done by Shakespeare. Her mother was also consumed by the idea that the way the young lovers and those who helped them were treated had left a curse on their family lines, and was desperately trying to find a way to resolve it.

Honestly, with the exception of some frank selfishness that's a little disconcerting, but probably more honest than plain grief, I like most of that. It's suspenseful, it's interesting historical fiction.

Then, the romance had to get involved.

First, the fact that Guiletta/Julie is STILL a virgin, despite being - gasp - in her twenties, is made an enormously big deal. Give. Me. A. Break. Someone who's waiting for the right person shouldn't allow herself to feel like shit because her sister makes fun of her. I mean, maybe it's realistic to be a little embarrassed. At the same time, she obviously consciously makes the decision to wait - so what is there to be embarrassed about? If she wants to have sex, she could have and still can. If she doesn't, cool; she won't get knocked up.

Second - when she realizes that there is a present day Romeo Marescotti in her presence, the love story line becomes unbearable. I guess Fortier wanted it that way - a mirror to Shakespeare's. A redemption of a historical romance gone awry. But I have the same problem with the book that I have with Shakespeare's couple - these people fall in love too hard, too fast. Usually, when that happens in real life, you realize: "Shit. I don't know this person. The sex (hopefully) is great, but I'm not really in love."

Basically, I feel like the modern day Romeo & Guilietta in Fortier's book are too adult to be acting like their love struck, historical teenaged counterparts.

Other than the love story line, I thought this book was tolerable. Pretty well written, and pretty interesting. The love story line really only gets annoying in the last half or third of the book. Prior to that, it's pretty well done, too.

If you want a quick read, and/or you're interested in a taste of the historical background and influences on Shakespeare's play, and/or you like romance novels, I say give this one a try. In general, it's interesting.

Wait - When Did April Get Here?

2010-04-01T07:21:00.000-07:00

For some reason, it seemed like I had plenty of time to do my outline - until last night. So here I sit, outline-less, with only a vague idea, and a little bit panicked.

We shall see how this ScriptFrenzy goes.

In the Wee Hours of the Morning, by which I mean 11, b/c I Like Sleeping In -

2010-03-27T09:16:00.000-07:00

I finished Christopher Moore's Bite Me: A Love Story.

I'm a lovely vibrant violet, and have one of the best titles ever.

It's a book that you should read. Granted, I am assuming that you have a sense of humor, enjoy laughing, and are human - but given that I was correct, (as I've already assumed I am), you should read Bite Me.

As I've already stated, it's funny. It's also a wild ride. The plot is entertaining, while keeping the reader in suspense. Yet, one of the best things about it, in my opinion, is its' accessibility.

Bite Me: A Love Story is the third book in a series by the talented Mr. Moore. The first book in the series is entitled Bloodsucking Fiends: A Love Story (and holds a special place in my heart, as it was my introduction to Mr. Moore's writing). The second book is called You Suck: A Love Story. Yet, I feel that while the story is richer and probably more meaningful if you've read the first two books in the series, it is still not necessary to read the first two books first. Bite Me: A Love Story begins with a recap, but a recap told in such a fun, hilarious narrative voice that anyone who doesn't delight in reading it doesn't have a heart (which probably means you are not a human being, and therefore, don't fall under the assumptions with which I began this blog). With the recap, any reader receives enough of the overall story that this book is enjoyable and worth reading.

As all of the titles suggest, these books are vampire stories. Along with the horror elements that are generally necessitated by such subject matter, there are also romantic and sensual elements to all of the stories.

The thing that really makes this book a "must-read," though, is the characterization. Christopher Moore does a great job at creating characters. The reader grows to love and care about them. The characters are realistic - flawed, and as ridiculous as humans often are. The recap that begins the book, for example, is mainly humorous in light of the voice that narrates it. The "voice" is that of a thin goth girl who calls herself "Abby Normal," who yearns to be a vampire, has numerous piercings and tattoos, as well as a liking for gummi bears, though she eats the heads first, and the narration is occurring on her blog. Abby is only one of many characters you need to meet.

Ultimately, the only reason to refrain from reading this novel is for fear of getting too much public attention from guffawing.

Expanding My Horizons: Aka, Reading Fiction about Charlotte Bronte

2010-03-24T18:56:00.001-07:00

The latest ARC I received is entitled Romancing Miss Bronte, and is written by Juliet Gael. Here's a link to the Barnes & Noble page about this book, and here's the cover:

Romancing Miss Bronte is an historical fiction concerning Charlotte Bronte, the author of Jane Eyre, Shirley, and Villette.

Frankly, I wasn't expecting to like this book, as I'm picky regarding historical fiction and romance novels.

But I did like it. Immensely.

Overall, the story was entertaining, and felt pretty authentic. It's obvious that the author did her homework. Charlotte Bronte went through some tough times - and if you know nothing about Miss Bronte's history, this book is an interesting introduction to them.

Charlotte's other siblings come to life, as well. Emily Bronte, who wrote Wuthering Heights, Anne Bronte, who wrote Agnes Grey, and their brother Branwell, who wasn't particularly famous for his literary works.

My interest was kept throughout the entire novel. At the end of the novel, I felt like I knew more about the Brontes, and I really cared about what happened to the characters.

The title is a bit misleading, however. The title makes this book sound like a romance - and while there is romance in it, that lovey-dovey stuff doesn't come into the picture until the narrative has already progressed fairly far. There is yearning, loss, and many other strong feelings, but love that is felt by both parties takes awhile to evolve. Personally, I like this. If a reader is expecting a predictable romance, however, this book is not one of them.

In summation, Romancing Miss Bronte is a very enjoyable read. Its' sentiments often resemble the Romantic era more than the Victorian, and love is dealt with in various ways, not just the predictable ways in which romance novels often do. Based on my prior knowledge of Charlotte Bronte's life, the book seems to be mostly historically accurate. I read through this book quickly, and I recommend it to anyone who is fond of fiction, who is, in particular, a fan of the Brontes, and/or a fan of romantic or literary fiction.

Romancing Miss Bronte is released April 27, 2010.

I'm Tired - Rambling Will Ensue

2010-03-22T19:14:00.000-07:00

So Frenziers*, with April approaching, preparation is a good idea.

As I stated in my previous post, I haven't written a play in quite some time - junior year of high school, to be exact. Due to this prolonged length of time, I went to Barnes & Noble** once I decided to participate in ScriptFrenzy for a resource book.

I'm currently reading The Playwright's Guidebook: An insightful primer on the art of dramatic writing by Stuart Spencer. I am finding it very helpful and interesting.

I also went to a used bookstore, where I purchased Tennessee Williams' "A Streetcar Named Desire" and Edmond Rostand's "Cyrano de Bergerac"***. I have actually never read either of these plays, but am greatly looking forward to it.

What preparations, if any, are YOU doing?

*"Frenziers" is my newly invented term (as of a few minutes ago) for people doing ScriptFrenzy.

**I went to a physical store, not the website.

***I also purchased a copy of Agatha Christie's autobiography, which I had previously somehow not known existed until I laid my eyes on it. Being an avid Christie fan, I was exceedingly excited.

A New Challenge

2010-03-20T07:28:00.000-07:00

I began this blog because I decided to participate in National Novel Writing Month.

Now, a new challenge has presented itself: ScriptFrenzy. Writing a 100 page script in the month of April.

YOU should sign up, too. There are some helpful tips on the page, and we've got a week and a half for plotting purposes.

I, personally, have not written a play in a long time. I think it's going to be fun. Especially since I'm fond of dialogue.

If you're participating, let me know in the comments! Also, relate your username, so we can be ScriptFrenzy writing buddies.

Book Review: White Cat

2010-03-10T07:05:00.000-08:00

I didn't win her "con"-test, but I managed to snag my hands on a copy of Holly Black's White Cat, anyway. Here's the cover, and a link to the Barnes & Noble webpage whereby you can pre-order a copy (and you should).

White Cat is the first book in a series called "The Curse Workers." In this series, Black is creating an alternate world, in which some people have special abilities that are exciting and terrifying to those who do not have such abilities. Thus, they are referred to as "Curse Workers."

Black has such a way with words. If you haven't read one of her books, then you may not realize this, and I suggest remedying the situation immediately. She has also written a trilogy of interrelated YA books: Tithe, Valiant, and Ironside. (Amazing.) She wrote The Spiderwick Chronicles, working with her friend and illustrator Tony DiTerlizzi - a fantastic series meant to be a good read, while still being more reader friendly, so that people aren't overwhelmed.

Black tends to write fantasy works, but she is able to make them believable. You read Tithe, and suddenly, the fairy world doesn't seem that far away. I read White Cat, and personally thought "Wouldn't it be cool if everyone wore gloves?" (See, you have no idea what I'm talking about - but you CAN know, if you purchase the book.)

The action moves smoothly, the characters aren't all perfect, aren't all stereotypes, and cause the reader to feel for them.

I cannot rave enough about this book. I highly suggest reading it, and I know I'm looking forward to the sequel Red Glove.

A Mystery Book I Didn't Much Like

2010-03-02T13:20:00.000-08:00

So...that ARC I bragged about on Twitter? Took me forever to read. It's not even an "Advanced" copy anymore, since it's been available for purchase since February 23. Here's the cover, and a link to purchase the book from Barnes & Noble:

Why did this book take me a long time to read? It didn't hold my interest.

It's historical fiction, using as its' protagonist detective the actual "renegade monk and excommunicate Giordano Bruno." It takes place at Oxford University. Giordano Bruno goes there with his pal, poet Sir Philip Sidney (whose poetry I rather adore, really...if you haven't heard of Sidney, you should read some of his work), to engage in argument with the Rector (the dude in charge) about whether or not the universe is heliocentric. On this trip, the university "fellows" (basically, guys who have been around for awhile and have some power) begin dying. Bruno, apparently some great philanthropist, looks into the murders, and discovers Oxfordian secrets.

Heresy fell into a problem that I have with a lot of historical fiction - in trying to sound "authentic" and "old" it came across as "fake" and "boring." The dialogue, and the tone of narration throughout the book was very off-putting. I realize that it's hard to write historical fiction that sounds authentic - but if you're going to try to make it sound authentic, then you need to read a lot of primary sources from that time period, and have someone you trust, also familiar with primary sources, read it over, in order to appease fickle readers such as myself.

But really? This is FICTION. If I wanted to read "authentic" sixteenth century writing, I would literally read authentic sixteenth century writing. I personally felt that a more modern tone of voice would have made this book much more enjoyable.

Worse than the off-putting tone, however, was the characterization. I did not care about these characters. Any of them. I didn't care about the protagonist Giordano Bruno.

Do you ever watch horror movies, and want to yell at the person who is entering someone else's house? It's like: "Yeah, I know you're curious, but that's RUDE. Don't go in there unless you're invited, asshole!"

That's how I felt reading this book. I was like: "Why are you investigating these murders?" I really got the impression that Mr. Bruno was a nosy jerk who thought he had the right to know everything about everything because he wanted to. Um, no.

I did not care about the person who ended up being a murderer.

I did not care about the people who were murdered. I mean, murder is wrong, but I just didn't feel like I knew these people.

I certainly did NOT care about Bruno's love interest. She struck me as an annoying slut. I couldn't comprehend why he cared about her so much. Oh, wait. Yes I could. B/c she has tits. Congratulations, Bruno. Your taste in women rivals that of Hugh Hefner.

Perhaps worse than the poor characterization and off-putting tone of narration, however, was the plot. Mostly b/c there wasn't one.

Okay, okay, that's too harsh. There was a plot. It was just strung out so much that in the lengthy course of time it took me to read the book, I wasn't really following it that well. It kind of felt all over the place.

The book has all of this talk about how persecution and torture about beliefs that aren't going to harm anybody is WRONG (thus the title: Heresy). Frankly, when the book was wrapped up, I didn't much care. I was just glad not to be tortured any longer.

I'm sorry, S.J. Parris. I feel like you had some interesting ideas, and really good intentions. I just don't feel like they were carried out very well.

Sometimes People Really Piss Me Off

2010-02-26T12:16:00.000-08:00

Today's rant comes courtesy of: I am a feminist who not only refuses to apologize for her status, but furthermore, refuses to feel bad about it because people are too stupid to find out the actual definition of a word before denigrating it.

What is a feminist? Is she necessarily someone who hates all men? No. Is she a lesbian? Possibly. (I'm not.) Does she burn her bras? According to this article, women never actually did that. But it's possible.

In my opinion, a feminist is someone who thinks that men and women are equals. On an individual level, sure, men and women are different. Then again, on an individual level, two women are different. That's the thing about people. We've all got our strengths and weaknesses. Overall, however, I think I deserve the same amount of respect as a man.

I am appalled when someone begins talking badly about "feminists" in these broad terms, and obviously has no idea that there is a positive side to feminism. It happens all of the time. It happened the other night in a phone conversation I was having with a white male I happen to know.

Now, during the course of this conversation, this male said he was "sick of being blamed for everything because he's white and a guy." He said that, sure, his ancestors HAD had power for the majority of history and they'd done some pretty shitty things with that power, but then went on, "but that's not me! I, PERSONALLY, didn't do those horrible things. So why am I being blamed?"

Here's the thing. History matters.

I'm not just saying this because I was basically a history major in college. I'm saying it because it's true.

There's that oft-quoted saying: "Those who do not learn history are doomed to repeat it." Yet I think history's importance encompasses more than learning from the mistakes of others. Our history is an essential component of ourselves.

Even if you don't care about history, it affects you. Your ancestors passed down their conception of life along with genes. You not only get your physical appearance from these people whom you've never met, your views are affected by the views of your parents, which were in turn affected by the views of their parents, which were in turn affected by the views of their parents, and so on and so forth.

So if your ancestors were slave owners, just because you know they were wrong doesn't mean we should all just forget about it.

Families share everything. Everything includes history.

If you're white and male you've got a shitload of history backing you up to give you all of these privileges. Because white males have been primarily in power for a long time. Along with these privileges comes the guilt. Because white males have been in power by treating females and minorities like shit for a long time.

Deal with it.

Do not act like I'm odd or crazy or stupid because I'm a feminist. As a feminist, as someone who thinks males and females are equals, and should be treated as such, I am someone who is going against the grain of tradition that humans have worn away over time.

I wish everyone was a feminist. Sadly, they are not. If you're reading this, and you didn't previously consider yourself a feminist, I hope you reconsider.

Differing Perspectives

2010-02-24T07:03:00.000-08:00

"The Box," the movie with Cameron Diaz and James Marsden, came out on DVD Tuesday. One of the perks to working at a video store is that you get to watch the movies a little early, so that you can tell inquiring minds/customers your opinion of the new releases.

So there's this female I work with - for the sake of anonymity, we'll call her Napkin. So Napkin watched "The Box" before many of the other employees, and had a little rant about the movie. "They didn't explain anything!" Napkin cried.

I found this surprising, because, if you've seen the trailer, it's quite clear that "The Box" is one of those thrillers with an intricate plot that is supposed to have at least most of the plot lines tied up before the movie ends. "They didn't explain anything?" I asked.
"They didn't explain anything!" Napkin repeated. "At the end of the movie, it's completely unclear what's going on!"

Not that I don't trust Napkin or anything, but I decided to watch the movie anyway.

I was then perplexed.

You see, dear reader, whom I choose to address in the second person though you're probably nonexistent, I thought that pretty much everything was explained, and that furthermore, much was insinuated. I felt a sense of completion at the end of the movie.

This differing of perspectives got me thinking about explanation in writing.

In the movie which I've been using as an example, I feel that the screenwriter showed us the dots, connected most of the lines, and left the filling in of the picture to the reader's intelligence. Not to say that Napkin isn't intelligent, for she is.

It seems to me, however, that Napkin wants everything explained to her. In detail. Whereas I find too much detail excruciating and boring.

As someone who writes (though not as much as she should be, lately), I'm not going to lie - I mostly write for myself. Don't get me wrong, I want other people to like my writing, too. I want to write something I know I am proud of first, though. Then I get too lazy to revise, so, you know, stuff stays the way I wrote it, and people probably think I'm crazy.

Yet I digress. As a writer, I don't want to confuse my readers. But I also don't want to spell everything out for them, and treat them like idiots.

So how much explanation is TOO MUCH explanation? And how do we know when we're giving too little explanation? I realize the obvious answer is to have someone else read your work. It seems to me, however, that opinions on this question can be too varying. For example, my dear, respected co-worker Napkin and I both like each other, but we're on opposite ends of the spectrum.

Thoughts?

Benjamin Pratt Book Review

2010-02-06T16:35:00.001-08:00

I received an ARC of We the Children, the first book in the Benjamin Pratt & the Keepers of the School book series. These books are written by Andrew Clements, and illustrated by Adam Stower.

Aimed at the age group from 7-10 years old, this book is a quick read. The plot is sort of ridiculous, but fun, and character development is started, but doesn't feel fully fleshed out. Yet. It is clear that the series will need to be read as a whole for completion of the story. This book begins the tale, but feels mostly like exposition. It's setting the scene, giving the necessary background information for the story arc to follow.

To be fair, I don't tend to read books intended for this age group, anymore. At the same time, I wouldn't recommend reading this book yet, because I feel that a book should be more well-rounded on its' own. I might be willing to recommend the book series as a whole, but it's not finished, so I can't really say yet.

I would say this first book is interesting, and I'm curious as to what will happen next. It's a Simon & Schuster book that comes out in April of this year. If you think this book might be for you or someone you know, click the picture above for more information.

My Con, Entered in Holly Black's ARC Contest

2010-02-04T20:30:00.000-08:00

I was about eleven or twelve, and I shared a room with my sister, who is six years younger than I am. I am the oldest sibling; my sister is the youngest sibling - we never talked; everything was a quarrel.

One of our recurring fights had to do with keeping our room clean. I, being the older, was blamed if the room didn't meet my parents' standards, which meant that I often had to clean up after my sister, as well. I got tired of my sister's clothes and toys being on the floor pretty quickly.

So one day, my mother went out to run some errands, telling us that our room better be clean by the time she returned home. My sister proceeded to sit down on the floor and watch me clean. I picked up my clothes, yelling at her to do the same; I picked up my books, yelling at her to do the same; she sat in her position on the floor and said: "I am!," though she clearly wasn't.

The year before I had read "Little Women," and I remembered Beth's death scene well. So I put on my "sick voice," you know, the one you use to get out of school but your mother doesn't tend to believe, and I told my sister that I wasn't feeling too well. I asked her to please help me clean, because I had scarlet fever and I was dying. I continued the story, saying that there wasn't a cure, so I was definitely going to die - and that, because there was no cure, I hadn't told our parents about my illness, because it would just make them sad. Therefore, she should help me clean and not tell our parents about my illness.

Turned out, my sister had a heart (who knew?). She told me to lie down on the bed, asked if I needed anything to eat or drink, and proceeded to clean.

Of course, when my mother came through the door, my sister ran to her crying because I was dying. Luckily, my mother had to struggle too hard not to laugh, so I didn't get more than a scolding.

It was kind of mean, and it probably only worked because my sister was only 5 or 6, but it's a pretty hard con to beat.

Directing You to a Contest

2010-02-04T10:38:00.000-08:00

If you're not in love with Holly Black's writing, it's probably because you haven't read her work. She's amazing & she's offering ARCs (Advanced Reading Copies) of her novel White Cat to certain people who tell her about a con they've pulled. Go here to enter!

Yes, I Read Another Jane Austen Supernatural Book

2010-01-28T13:43:00.000-08:00

Now, before you groan and begin asking mean-spirited questions, let me ask them for you. Trust me, I've groaned and asked myself the same things. What is with all the Austen and paranormal stuff? Why do so many authors aspire to write about Austen and fail? Why do I keep giving these authors the opportunity to dash my hopes over and over and over again?

This is why:

Jane Bites Back by Michael Thomas Ford

Jane Bites Back is about Jane Austen, beloved author and vampire, currently living in Brakeston, NY, owning a bookstore selling many items relating to herself, while her own manuscript (not Sanditon) has been rejected by publishers for 2 centuries. There are also a few men in her life, which, of course, results in romantic confusion. It's an interesting idea, a great title, and obviously the concept would be so easy to do poorly.

Except Ford did an excellent job executing his idea effectively. This book is exactly what I look for: funny, clever, relatable. It's a quick read that isn't pretentious, is written well, and that kept me guessing. Also, there are numerous literary and pop culture references. You can feel, reading this book, that Ford had fun writing it, and in turn, it is fun to read.

Dealing with a woman who wrote some of the most popular romances of all time, Jane Bites Back explores the concept of romance, and points out that Austen's books were so much more than romance (which might be part of the reason that they still have readers). I love so much about this book, but don't want to give too much away. Suffice it to say, I think you should read it.

Near-Brush with Celebrity (Photo)

2010-01-25T07:46:00.000-08:00

I was working at the video store last night, and had an interesting interaction with a couple of customers.

They were sisters - they both had the same shade of dark blonde hair and similar facial features, but one of them looked a little bit older. They were renting a copy of "Seventeen Again," and the younger one said: "We saw him today!"

I wasn't planning to respond, but the older sister glared and said: "You weren't supposed to say anything! He's trying to stay on the down low."

They proceeded to relate a story about seeing a limousine that they hadn't seen before in West Lafayette, walking up, and coming upon Zac Efron & Vanessa Hudgens, as well as some Purdue students. I was shown a picture, obviously taken in a car, of a guy slightly obscured by shadow. It could have been Zac Efron - I didn't really look that closely, to be honest.

I thought it was great that these two girls were so excited by the prospect of having met the actor and his girlfriend, but I just...don't really care if the two rich young people were in the Lafayette, Indiana area.

Part of this might be due to the fact that I'm not personally very attracted to Mr. Efron. Yes, he has nice abs in "Seventeen Again." I guess he's actually about my age, but he tends to play younger guys in his roles, so I think of him as younger than he is. And teenage boys aren't really my type of guy, as I'm not a teenager myself.

Part of this might be because I have this feeling that meeting someone whose artistry you admire seems like it could far too easily result in disillusionment. Examples in media have been made that portray the importance of idealism (Rob, of robwillreview.com, did a particularly good job talking about this in his review of "Julie & Julia"). For me, however, idealism can very quickly turn sour. I didn't really have an opinion of Megan Fox, other than that she's pretty - then she began making stupid comments, and now, I don't particularly care for her.

So, what do YOU think? Does the prospect of meeting famous people excite you or would you rather appreciate the art without meeting the artist?

Reposting: Because I'm Lazy. Also, Related to Twilight

2010-01-21T06:51:00.000-08:00

In honor of all of this buzz about a Twilight graphic novel (because why READ Bella moping around when you can SEE it in non-animated form?), I thought I would repost a blog I originally wrote on Maureen Johnson's ning.

Today's rant is about Twilight. I'm not bashing the book. I know a lot of people like it, and that's fine. I'm not a huge fan, myself, but we all have different tastes.

No, my current problem with Twilight are the excuses people make for me about why I don't like the book. Even people who know me! (Well, kind of know me.)

Basically, people assume 1) I don't like romance, 2) I'm not into vampires, & 3) I'm closed-minded.

Now, the first two points just show that these people don't know me.

1) I AM a cynic. You know what? I'm smart enough to know that a lot of guys my age LIE to girls all the time. They lie to get a girl in bed, they lie because of societal pressure, they lie for fun. A lot of guys are really cool. A lot of guys are jerks. That's the way it is; that's the way it's always been. That doesn't mean I don't believe in romance.

Really, I believe in romance for other people. I'm not going to get super deep with this, but I will conclude this point with the fact that believing in romance for other people means that I like reading about romance - when it's well done.

2) Most romance is NOT well done.

It's just not. Go to any bookstore, walk to the section titled "romance." It's not that there aren't any good books in there, it's just that they're hidden by SMUT. Listen, I've read enough "romance" novels to consider the self-titled genre to generally be predictable, and to think that the only reason most people read them is for the sex scenes. To which I say - suck it up, and buy porn.*

The best romance novels, the ones with REAL romance in them? They're literature, prose that uses metaphor and symbolism, because romance is poetry, and can't be communicated correctly if the writing is too literal.

3) The relationship between Edward and Bella is not a healthy one.

First of all, it's "love at first sight." Give. Me. A. Break. I'm one of those people who doesn't believe you can call it love until you get to know the other person. And Bella was considering herself "in love" before she'd really spoken to Edward. That's not love guys, that's obsession.

Secondly, Bella is AFRAID of Edward. While this makes sense, with the whole "he's a vampire, dude," thing going on, it's not cool to date someone you're afraid of. And Bella is afraid, repeatedly, in Twilight.**

Thirdly, Edward is a stalker. He watches her sleep, and her response is, "Oh, that's cute. I hope I didn't drool." I guess you could say that since they're both obsessed, it's all cool. The fact is, if I had been talking this way when I was sixteen, my parents would have sent me to a therapist.

4) I adore vampire stories.

From the time I've been about ten until the time I was eighteen, almost everything I read was supernatural romance. Christopher Pike & L.J. Smith wrote vampire stories, and I really enjoyed those.

My mother was kind of exasperated, and thought something was wrong with me, because I liked vampires so much.

Short of going to the dentist to get fangs and drinking blood, I couldn't be MORE of a vampire fan.

5) I try really hard to be an open-minded person.

I went into my initial reading of Twilight expecting too much, perhaps. I forced myself to read it again this year, to see if I really didn't like it, or if I had been being too harsh.

It's an okay book, but I think it's too long, and I don't think it's very well written.

It might be better than anything I ever write, but I don't purport to be a great writer. And neither, from Stephenie Meyer's interviews, it seems, does she. She wrote a book for fun. She liked it, her sister liked it, I think her editor should have forced her to pare it down a lot more.

I didn't get "sucked in" like a lot of people. It's not to my tastes.

I kind of like that Meyer inverted a lot of vampire stereotypes - she made the vampires in her stories her own. I can appreciate ingenuity. Saying, "Oh, well, maybe you don't like it because Edward's SPARKLY" really makes me angry. I thought it was kind of cool, though I thought it was an incredibly cheesy effect in the movie.

I don't wish any harm on the author, herself, I don't think her books should be burnt (I don't think ANY books should be burnt), I just didn't like the book.

I'm a literate person. I'm not stupid. I'm not against romance. I like vampires. I JUST DIDN'T LIKE THE BOOK!

I don't think that makes me a horrible person. I don't have a problem with people who like Twilight, so why do my "friends" who like Twilight have such a problem with me not liking it?

*Frankly, this has been my opinion since I was in middle school. If you like romance, that's cool, so long as you admit that often, these books tend to be predictable and have many gratuitous sex scenes.

**A lot of people, when I mention this concept of Bella being afraid, say, "What are you talking about? I didn't get that impression." Well, not everyone reading Twilight took notes, either, and I'm not sure what that says about me, as a person, but it DOES mean that I can cite moments of fright. Bella explicitly mentions being scared on the following pages: 54, 89, 107, 251, 264. I stopped taking as many notes about halfway through the book, so there may be more references, but there are at least that many.

On Why I Avoid Watching "Family Guy"

2010-01-18T20:18:00.000-08:00

I hate Lois Griffin.

While I realize hatred of a fictional character is pretty stupid and pointless, I can't help it. Feelings of ill will fester inside of me when I hear her loud voice being passive or ineffective.

One of the great things about Family Guy is that everyone on the show is an asshole sometimes - like in real life. Let's face it: absolute sweethearts who always do the right thing and are always nice only exist in the form of the Disney princess. In real life, people often suffer from jackass syndrome, so the characters in the show Family Guy are realistic.

Lois Griffin, however, while being a MILF, is just a horrible, horrible fictional woman. She has no excuses for being horrible, and her only redeeming quality is her looks. Frankly, that's not enough.

In case you missed WHY exactly Lois is horrible, let me list the reasons:

*She allows her husband to hurt other people. She simply ignores him when he's doing many inappropriate things. She encourages him to continue thinking of women as property, good for sex and cleaning the house.

*She continually insults her daughter Meg, and laughs when others insult her daughter. When she's not insulting Meg, she's generally ignoring her. She is an emotionally abusive bitch who deserves the death wish that Stewie harbors.

*She continually ignores her baby boy Stewie. There are numerous times when she outright ignores the baby, says something that makes it clear she understands him and just doesn't care, and somehow misses the fact that he's often trying to kill her. He's not exactly subtle in his maneuverings. She just doesn't pay enough attention to her baby to notice.

*She doesn't help her children. Her son Chris doesn't do well in school - why the hell doesn't she suggest a tutor? Her daughter has a lot of problems (which Lois has probably helped cause) - why doesn't she suggest a therapist?

*She generally lets her husband get drunk on a regular basis without comment.

*In numerous episodes, she makes it clear that she values sex with her husband more than the needs of her children. Yes, sex is an important part of any relationship, but the frequency with which references are made to the Griffins' sexual intimacy indicates that, in general, Lois Griffin is just a selfish bitch who values sex more than her children.

Are we supposed to feel bad for her because she came from a family with a lot of money, and has deteriorated to living in a poor household with a technically retarded husband with a drinking problem and three whiny kids? No. It has been made clear in many episodes that Lois Griffin CHOSE her current life situation, that she values it more than the lifestyle in which she grew up. It has been made clear that Lois considers the lifestyle in which she was raised to be superficial, and that she thinks money complicates things. Moreover, it is clear that she had her pick of men. She picked Peter, a guy she loves so long as he is in the vicinity (i.e., she has re-married and talked about his being physically incapacitated being unacceptable in episodes).

She has also mentioned having tried to drink & smoke her baby to death, only to "chicken out," which resulted in Chris. She has mentioned not knowing her birth control was invalidated by other medication to her teenage daughter, basically letting her kids know, in general, that they were accidents.

She is a horrible fictional woman, and I hate her. She has no redeeming qualities to make up for all of her horrible, horrible character traits. It revolts me to hear that nasally voice, particularly as the words coming out of her mouth are generally comedic remarks made at the expense of her children.

Knowing that she is from a wealthy family, and from her mannerisms and remarks, knowing that she was well-educated makes her behavior all the more appalling.

I HATE Lois Griffin.

And that is why I don't watch Family Guy anymore.

It Sucks When People Don't Update Regularly, Doesn't It?

2010-01-15T06:48:00.000-08:00

As my blogging is hardly of the caliber of Maureen Johnson or Barbara Poelle, I should probably stop being lazy and do a real blog, instead of this apology one. (Isn't that the beauty of "probably," though?)

So...yes. I didn't mean to blog for three days in a row (right at the beginning of the year, too!), and then drop off of the face of the Earth. Those three blogs were extremely misleading. I don't tend to blog very often. I like to blog at least twice a month. Often, with my work schedule, I'm a bit tired. The blog sprint previously mentioned happened, I believe, because I had caught up on my sleep. Suddenly, my brain was capable of thought again!

Now, however, it is tired once more. I will probably blog again soon. I have a couple of ideas as to what I would like to blog about. Getting the words out coherently, however, is another matter.

On Quitting & Historical Fantasy

2010-01-03T09:42:00.000-08:00

I tried. I mean, I have really been trying to force myself to finish Diana Gabaldon's Outlander. And if I was really dead set on finishing the novel, of course, I could.

But it's really just not interesting me, anymore.

This brings me to a topic that might be difficult to understand: I don't really like fantasy.

I mean, good writing is good writing. I like fantasy novels that are well done.

It seems to me, however, from what I have gleaned from reading fantasy writers' blogs and talking to people who like to write, that the fun of fantasy is the world-building. And unless that is really well done, without going into so much detail that I feel like someone is physically trying to jam a map into my head, I don't tend to like reading it.

I'm not against fantastical things, such as people being worshipped becoming gods in Christopher Moore's Island of the Sequined Love Nun or Chris Elliott inserting himself into Victorian London in The Shroud of the Thwacker.

I guess my reading and writing preferences tend to deal with people. I want to care about the characters, whether I love them or hate them. I want to feel suspense and anticipation.

And a lot of times, when I'm reading fantasy novels, the effort has been put into the world-building, and I don't care about the characters.

This is how I felt, reading Diana Gabaldon's Outlander. It started out interesting and mildly funny. Once the time travel happened, however, (oh, yeah - spoiler, for those who haven't read Outlander - there's time travel) the plot felt so predictable. I knew - many more spoilers about to come; you have been warned - whom the main character was going to fall in love with, I was perplexed that she didn't put up more of a fight when she was told she had to marry him (I know there were extenuating circumstances; I don't care...she's already married; it's weird that she so readily acquiesced), and then she and her guy are just rutting like pigs for far too long... I got bored. Once the story started up again, and it wasn't "shy sex talk" and frantic mating anymore, but actual plot once more, I realized I just don't care about these characters.

Worse, when I DO care about the characters, it's usually me being annoyed with one of them.

Like the scene where Claire's nearly raped and kills her attacker. Good for her, girl power and all that - and then, she and lover-boy are in shock, so they have to have seconds of crazy wild sex... Okay, what? You've got to have blood all over you, and you almost had some guy forcing himself onto you, and your first response once the danger is over... is to have sex.

Basically, I feel that Outlander is a cheesy romance novel, and with all of the well-written material out there, don't feel like I want to waste my time with this poor excuse for literature. Perhaps I'm wrong. Maybe somewhere in the rest of this novel lies an amazing story. But I doubt it.

Thoughts?

Discoveries

2010-01-02T11:54:00.000-08:00

Tina peered through the microscope, her brow furrowing at the sight before her. After several seconds of thinking and pursing her lips, she flipped open her cell phone, and dialed Gregory's number.

He answered on the fourth ring, his voice groggy with sleep. "Hello?"

"Greg, I know that we just broke up a few nights ago, but you're still my lab partner, and you're the only person I can trust with this discovery I just made. I need you to come to the lab right now."

"Right now?" After a brief pause, Greg protested: "Shit, Tina, it's only two o'clock in the morning! I just went to bed half an hour ago, and it's freezing outside..."

"Greg. Please. I wouldn't have called you if it wasn't important."

"This better be fucking important," Greg said, his voice becoming slightly muffled and labored, so that Tina knew he was pulling on a pair of blue jeans.

"It is," she responded. "Thank you, Greg. I know - well, just - thank you."

***Twenty Minutes Later***

"So what is this oh-so-significant discovery you've made?" Greg asked, a gust of cold wind following him into the laboratory and ruffling his hair, the way Tina used to ruffle it as they lay in bed together. "Hello? Earth to Tina..." Greg snapped his fingers, impatient, bringing Tina back to the cold reality in which she now existed, a single girl in her twenties, no longer loved.

"Right. Um..." Tina fumbled for words, retreating towards their lab station.

"Have you been getting any sleep recently?" Greg asked, his brow furrowing. "Tina, you know how you get when you don't get enough sleep."

"I may take longer to put my sentences together, but at least they're not vague and almost incoherent like yours," Tina snapped.

"Listen, I've kind of got to get back to my apartment a.s.a.p., so just tell me what's going on."

"What's the matter? Already have a new girl in your bed?"

"Tina - "

"Yeah, yeah, I know. It's none of my business." Tina waved towards the lab station behind her. "Look through the microscope."

Greg complied, resurfacing a minute later and giving her a questioning look.

"I know," Tina said. "I've never seen the molecular structure before. It's literally a new leaf. That color, and - "

"Tina," Greg said, his eyebrows coming together and making him a Cyclops.

"I mean, A NEW LEAF! I think we both know what that means, Greg..."

"Yeah, I think we both know what this means," Greg agreed.

"It's a sign. The apocalypse is impending. The years match up with Nostradamus predictions, and... That color...it's so disturbing." Tina put her hands to her head, retreating until she bumped into the coat hooks behind her. Her purse fell to the floor, the glint of metal catching her eye.

"Tina, I'm so sorry..." Greg said, walking after her, holding out his arms to embrace her.

Tina didn't want to be embraced. She didn't want to have to worry about the end of the world as they knew it. "I feel fine," she said, quickly retrieving the handgun from her purse, putting it in her mouth, and pulling the trigger.

Greg stood in place, shocked. Brains and blood spattered the wall before which, until a few seconds ago, Tina had stood, alive. Looking back at the microscope, Greg whispered, "It's fall, Tina. It's just an orange-red leaf." He pulled his cell phone out of his pocket, dialed the campus police, and hoped that Amy would still be in his bed when he got home.

First Post of 2010!

2010-01-01T12:18:00.000-08:00

Rather than reminisce and make myself feel old (I was in HIGH SCHOOL at the beginning of the decade) or talk about "resolutions" (I'll leave that to Karen Denise, who is hosting a contest about them) that are cliche and bore my one or two readers to death, I thought I would talk about something controversial.Movies that I like better than the books.

I got the idea from reading this blog post, in which ten movies that the blog writer considered better than their written counterparts are listed. I am only going to discuss five movies today, and I am also going to explain WHY I think the movies are better in a little bit of detail.

I will give the disclaimer that, in general, I like the written work better. One in awhile, however, I feel that the movie surpasses the book, and here are five such instances, for me:

1. Bram Stoker's Dracula

I'm not going to lie - I never quite finished Bram Stoker's actual novel. Were I to re-read Stoker's work in its' entirety, my opinion might differ. I had trouble finishing the novel, however, because I didn't particularly like Stoker's writing style, and I definitely did not care for the epistolary style he adopted with the diary and letter excerpts. Epistolary works are not my favorite - they have to be very carefully done for me to like them.

The movie, on the other hand, was beautiful and grotesque. Seeing the lush landscapes and beautiful costumes was a treat for my eyes. And the changes that the script made to Stoker's written work were favorable to me. I liked the backstory that they gave to Count Dracula. I liked the romance, and the fact that the movie gave the monster something of a heart, and even a choice as to whether or not to be horrible. He chose horrible, which is so much of what made the movie a horror movie.

In essence, the movie spoke to me in a way that the book did not.

2. Breakfast at Tiffany's

Don't get me wrong - I like Truman Capote's short story. He created a fantastic character with Holly Golightly, and I can understand why he was upset that his character wasn't portrayed by someone like Marilyn Monroe. Audrey Hepburn WAS too classy to be Capote's Holly. Yet no one who has seen the movie can deny that Audrey's Holly was entrancing and beautiful and delicate and wonderful.

I suppose I should admit that I am biased with respect to this movie/book combination, as well, for I adore Audrey Hepburn. Thus far, I have always enjoyed seeing her in a movie (admittedly, I have not seen all of them). She was a terrific actress, and turned "Breakfast at Tiffany's" into a different creation, but one that is beautiful all the same.

I simply adore Audrey Hepburn's Holly Golightly too much to wish that the movie production had been made without her, and therefore, been a more faithful adaptation of Capote's work.

3. The Secret of Nimh

I read this book and saw this movie when I was a child, but even then, I was struck by the fact that I enjoyed the movie more. I honestly cannot remember why. I know that I liked both the book AND the movie, but I liked the movie more. I read profusely as a child (much more than I do now), so I still trust the judgment.

4. Troy

This movie is one that I am somewhat ambivalent about. As a former Classical scholar, of course, I am in love with the "Iliad." There is no question about that - were the "Iliad" a person rather than a work of literature, I would make love to it. The story, the characters, the history, the mythology, in this work are so interesting, and so well put together, that anyone who has no appreciation for it whatsoever and was aware of its' existence is a moron.

I do like the movie in and of its' own right, and consider it better as an adaptation that people today will: 1. want to watch, and 2. be able to relate to.

See, one of the problems with the "Iliad," which I can admit, despite my fervor for the work, is that it's old. The people who go: "Um...duh I haven't seen that. It's not even in color" when referring to movies are, of course, going to have problems when trying to read the "Iliad." I think "Troy" does a good job of taking a monstrous work, and paring it down, while also making it more relatable to a modern audience.

The fact is, guys, Achilles didn't love Briseis. He was just pissed Agammemnon took her away because she was his war prize. Women were property to these dudes, especially the women from a different city.

Achilles was, on the other hand, a major asshole. The movie tried to make him a bit more likeable, but he was. Most guys were. Even Odysseus (I'm sorry, but going around philandering with goddesses and other women while your wife desperately staves off suitors and would-be rapists is fucked up. He may be smart, but by my standards, Odysseus is far, far, far from the ideal husband).

Considering the grand scope of the "Iliad," and all of the accompanying myths that are necessary to understand the "Iliad," I thought this movie was well done. With respect to modern audiences, filled with people who cannot comprehend why every human being can't just speak English to make things easier on them, I think that the movie is better than the epic poem.

More educated people, who have read the "Iliad," are going to comment on the fact that the timespan was miraculously short for a war, particularly the TEN YEARS the Trojan war is supposed to have been waged.

I'm ambivalent, but I enjoyed this movie.

5. Peter Pan

This entry isn't just with respect to the Disney movie, but to the idea of Peter Pan that I grew up with, and which I realized recently is mistook.

I thought Peter Pan was about a boy who doesn't want to grow up, and doesn't have to, because of the magical place that he lives in. I thought he was some statement about how being an adult is tough, and you shouldn't let the kid in you die, because then you won't have any fun in life.

Instead, when I actually read J.M. Barrie's play, I was overwhelmed with this feeling that Peter was not a good, Victorian boy. That he was cheating himself out of a lot, by not growing up, and would, in fact, if he chose never to leave Never Never Land, become a filthy, perverted pirate, intent on killing little boys for some reason, though he used to be one.

Reading the play was a disappointment because of the connotations Peter Pan has come to have in our society today.

I like J.M. Barrie's work, in general, I guess I just like the Peter Pan myth I grew up with more.

Those are my picks. Like I said earlier, you're welcome to disagree with them. Leave a comment, tell me why I'm wrong. Or tell me a movie that YOU think is better than the book.

Obviously, I Watch Too Many Movies

2009-12-27T15:13:00.000-08:00

Today's blog concerns "Jennifer's Body," the latest film willing to use Megan Fox's good looks in place of acting.

Watch words spew forth from my pretty mouth like emotionless vomit.

You probably know that the screenwriter was Diablo Cody, the chick who wrote "Juno" as well as a memoir about being a stripper. "Juno" was all right - entertaining, kind of cheesy, with a very unique female protagonist whose name alluded to the Classical world. On the other hand, "Jennifer's Body" struck me the wrong way almost immediately.

The story began with promise - interesting, entertaining, and funny. The story began in a literary fashion, beginning in medias res before quickly shifting to the earliest point in time that the movie was going to cover.

It was at the shift that I began to notice the dialogue.

The quirky, funny dialogue that characterized "Juno" so well appears to have been attempted again - and it isn't executed as well by the character who utilizes it most (*cough, cough* Fox *cough, cough*), and it feels false.

"Jennifer's Body" features a girl who becomes different, of course - I don't think I'm spoiling the movie for anyone when I say that Jennifer becomes a succubus. Yet, it seems quite clear that Jennifer is supposed to be an ordinary girl, on the pretty side, who is far more ordinary than she would like. Jennifer would like to be effortlessly gorgeous and self-assured, and not small town. Nothing about her character, however, indicates that she modifies language for the sake of whimsy.

Juno's interesting manner of speaking suited her; Jennifer's does not.

So watching this movie really makes me think about dialogue.

Dialogue, when utilized correctly, can do so much for a story. Hemingway wrote an entire story in dialogue ("Hills Like White Elephants"). Diablo Cody obviously likes writing dialogue, and has fun with it, which is great. In order to create something that other people are going to enjoy, however, a writer needs to use dialogue that suits the character. Ultimately, this means knowing your characters well enough to know exactly how that character speaks. Sometimes, this might involve doing research. And, of course, if you're too lazy to do research, then don't write about characters who will seem inauthentic without research.

To be fair, I feel like part of Cody's problem is one that many YA authors face: authentic TEEN dialogue. When you're not a teenager anymore, how do you know that your slang is up to date? Cody's solution is to create slang of her own - cheesy slang that not many teenagers would say (certainly not cheerleaders with a reputation to uphold).

Yet we've all read those YA stories that have outdated dialogue, or in which the character talks like a goody-two-shoes, and it feels like the only reason is because the author feels uncomfortable with a teenager saying "dirty" words. Teen dialogue is a legitimate problem, as is dialogue, in general.

I don't think that making up slang, clever and interesting though it may be, should be a writer's automatic response. I'm not exactly sure what I think the general response should be, however - or even if there should be a "general" response.

And no writer wants generic dialogue.

Thoughts? (I love comments!)

Julie & Julia - the Movie Version

2009-12-05T07:58:00.000-08:00

I just watched the DVD Julie & Julia. It was okay. I had problems with the memoir, I had problems with the movie (though, as all of the reviews said, Meryl Streep did an excellent job).

One of my biggest problems with the movie, however, was the fact that Amy Adams, portraying Julie Powell, kept talking about how she "wants to be a writer." They kind of alluded to what I'm going to discuss in more detail in the movie, and I was going to let it slide, but...spoiler alert...at the end of the movie, they did one of those "words rolling across the screen like what we want you to read is uber-important but we're really just trying to wrap things up without another few days of filming" and in those words were contained "She is a writer."

Well, duh, she's a writer. Didn't she write every, or almost every, day for an entire year on that blog about cooking? Isn't that where her memoir came from, and this movie? (There were also annoying words to the effect that a movie had been made from her book. I guess it was supposed to be cute, but it actually just pissed me off.)

Basically, what I don't think the movie made clear is the difference between being a "writer" and being an "author."

A writer is someone who writes. Period. By virtue of having a blog in which I write occasionally, I am a writer (though not necessarily a very good one). All you have to do to be a writer is write. So if you want to be a writer, stop reading, focus on whatever it is you wish was already written, and make the past tense I just used a reality.

An author is someone who has written something that has been published. It is harder to be an author than it is to be a writer.

Anyone can write. Not everyone has the persistence and dedication to get published.

Some people write because they want a big book deal that's going to get them a lot of money. Julie Powell's memoir became a bestseller, and that's awesome. That doesn't happen with every book, though. It doesn't even happen to many books. The huge bestseller is a rarity, like being struck twice by lightning. Therefore, wanting to become famous and rich is not a reason to become a writer and strive to get published.

Yes, realistically, it's something most of us would enjoy, but it's not the reason to write.

In sum, while we would all like to receive positive feedback and feel like creative genius, the only reason to become a writer is because you enjoy creating and/or relating stories.

NaNo: The Final Count

2009-12-02T08:05:00.001-08:00

A day late, but here it is...

At the end of NaNo, I had written 44,153 words.

Best NaNo yet, though I still didn't "win."

I might just sketch out where I was thinking of going, and set it away for awhile.

I have a new goal for December: losing some weight. I know this is usually a New Year's resolution, but for personal reasons, I find it imperative to do so now.

I will still be writing, but not nearly as much, particularly as I'm trying to catch up on my sleep and not get sick (everyone seems to be getting ill lately).

All of this, of course, is to provide an excuse for the fact that I probably won't be posting much for awhile.

Last Day of NaNo [Insert Scream Here]

2009-11-30T07:08:00.001-08:00

Still horribly behind. I am currently at: 43,253 words.

I have to get ready for work soon, after which I will probably be too tired to type.

I worked hard, and will struggle to get the words count to 45,000, but cannot realistically expect anything above that.

I have written more this NaNo than any of the previous ones, and am currently resenting my "middle-of-the-month whiny bitch" session. I mean, who do I think I am - Bella Swan? (The real answer is no, by the way. I'm not quite that crazy. Yet. I also haven't met a vampire, let alone some weird, "vegetarian" family of good-looking creepiness.)

Okay, I'm off, to write! Running to meet my deadline, with pen in hand, and held out before me, like a rapier. En guarde!

Quick Update

2009-11-28T14:12:00.001-08:00

NaNovel currently at 37,733 words.

Terribly behind, headache, must push forward.

Hoping I will not be called into work later.

Over the Half-Way Mark

2009-11-22T15:45:00.001-08:00

I made it over the half-way mark on my NaNo novel today!

That's right - I have over 25,000 words (and only a few days to finish about 25,000 more, but trying to think positive).

To celebrate, I came up with the following idea: the Snippet of the Day.

On my NaNo page (username: shellyquade), I will be posting a snippet of my novel which has been written THAT DAY.

Obviously, this is a ploy to attempt to motivate myself to write more every day, so that I have more to choose from. But, if you're bored, or like my writing style on this blog, or bored, you're welcome to check it out.

(I will not be cross-posting snippets to this blog, because I'm paranoid, and don't like the idea of leaving a trail of rough first draft material unless it's a contest entry. Plus, I'm lazy.)

Another NaNo Update

2009-11-22T08:07:00.000-08:00

I'm ridiculously behind. Like, about a week behind.

My boyfriend says he's proud of me anyway, because I've been working on the novel basically every day, though I definitely haven't been making much of a dent everyday. But that's what boyfriends are supposed to say if they don't want to sleep on the couch, so while it's sweet, I don't know that I give it much credence.

I just...I don't know how other people do it. I'm a slow writer. In general, if I write 500 words in a day, I think that's a pretty big accomplishment. To consecutively execute 1,667 words each day for 30 days...

Well, I'm still trying. But I'm also trying not to beat myself up for being an inferior writer who has set herself another goal she probably can't accomplish.

The Second Write-In

2009-11-07T18:37:00.000-08:00

I have not been feeling particularly well, lately. I'm not very sick, but my lack of energy and drive is astounding.

At the second write-in today, I hit a wall. I felt incredibly tired, went home, took a nap, and got an okay word count today. Not stellar or anything, but...okay.

I will continue to try.

Yesterday's word count: Abysmal

Today's word count: 1,994

This weekend will involve catching up on wordcount

2009-11-06T05:55:00.000-08:00

So...I got a little behind yesterday, too.

This is partly because I'm lazy, and partly because I didn't get a dinner break like I presumed, and in which I planned to write.

BUT...I hate it when people make excuses, which is exactly what that is. Dinner break or not, I should have gotten 1,667 words.

Instead, yesterday's word count was: 1,550

NaNo Report on Day 4

2009-11-05T05:15:00.000-08:00

Got a little behind yesterday. Slept in today.

Yesterday's word count: 1,368

NaNo Report on Day 3

2009-11-04T04:25:00.000-08:00

I don't really want to talk about yesterday. I am tired and disgruntled. As I was washing the filter holder thingamajig (see? this is why I want to be a writer...how could I refuse, when I'm so aware of the technical names for everything), I pushed my coffee pot onto the floor.

This means, of course, no coffee, which makes for a very grumpy Shelly Quade. (You might want to just leave now, before my wrath is transferred to you...)

Yesterday's word count: 1,816 words

NaNo Reporting on Day Two

2009-11-03T05:01:00.001-08:00

Yesterday went much more slowly. I feel more awake, though, despite the fact that chamomile is slowly making its' way down my throat (I couldn't resist! It smells so good...), so, we'll see.

Enough talking! I have work to do.

Yesterday's word count: 1973

I Know, I Know, I Haven't Posted in Forever

2009-11-02T04:45:00.000-08:00

Isn't it fun, though, when life gets super busy and then November gets here and you realize you committed yourself to writing 1,667 words a day?

By busy, of course, I mean slowly reading Stephen King's It and occasionally opening a word document when you're not working and staring at the screen as the story has halted.

Then again, it's November, which means working on an entirely new story!

I'm not going to lie, I'm pretty tired right now. So let me just report on yesterday and work on the NaNo story.

Yesterday, I woke up about 10:30ish, got my Starbucks, discovered that both Starbucks & Borders were pretty full at the moment, went to Purdue's union and got a little over 600 words done.

Then, I went to my first write-in EVER, regretted not having brought my headphones (while hearing other people talking can be distracting, it creeps me out not to have any sound around me), and wrote over 3,000 words more. So, yeah. Creepy or not, I've gotta recommend attending write-ins, if at all possible.

Yesterday's total word count: 3,801

P.S. If you feel like further procrastinating, Maureen Johnson wrote a blog post about NaNo.

November is Encroaching...

2009-10-15T06:34:00.000-07:00

And with it comes the necessity of writing the 50,000+ novel I committed to writing this year.

Any NaNo participants who want to follow my journey, or share their own, are encouraged to leave a comment. (I love comments, considering them to be much like Edward Cullen - sexy, sparkly, creepy little things, strung together to become perfection itself.)

To introduce my work, of which I now have an outline, and character names, I *think* it's chick lit. To be honest, I'm not entirely sure of the genre. It follows a couple of the relationships of a young female protagonist, neither of which was complementary to her, and how she begins to heal from both of these relationships (or at least, one).

How about you? What is your book summary this year? Or vague ideas floating in your head? Or anything else you feel like sharing?